OLTL Recap 2/10: Starr- Crossed Mothers

Buchansion: Bo and Nora are dodgy with Matthew and Cole about some family business. Then Matthew leaves to catch "the bus", which, I'm so sure the bus has a stop outside a giant, mansion that is basically located on a ranch, but whatever.

Gatehouse: Gigi comes home to find Roxie lounging on the sofa. Also, Shane isn't at school, and Roxie gave him a spiky hair do. It's not that alarming, in the least, but Gigi freaks out like he has bolts in his neck, or something.

Dorian's: Vicki shows up to visit Dorian and runs into Stubbs and his wife. They are hilariously dressed in tiaras and smoking jackets and jubilantly tell Vicki that Dorian gave them her house.

Buchansion: Clint angrily tells Nora that according to the will, David can rush in and evict them. Ha, that's going to be so awesome.

Hotel or somewhere: Dorian doesn't want to stay somewhere, at this motel, I guess? But David says he thought she wanted to change her life for him and asks if this was a lie? I love that I have no idea how many levels of conning are going on.

Credits

Buchansion: Cole sends Matthew off on the 14 mile hike to the nearest bus stop, so he can hang around and brood and do drugs. Rex shows up and joins the Buchanon et al meeting in progress.

Motel or somewhere: Dorian explains that she's a well known person in this town, and once word of their marriage is out the paps will storm the Zen Center. David wants everyone to know they are soul mates, but she insists that no one can know. David says she gets secretive when she's up to something and asks what she's up to now. She tries to think of a quick lie. Why wouldn't she have 25 lies at the ready? She's Dorian, for heaven's sakes!

Commercials

Buchansion Exterior: Cole decides to phelps up a michael and says "the day is looking better already" Cole, don't smoke pot on your doorstep. Super lame.

St. Anne's: group therapy. Doctor wants to talk to Brody about the Iraqi boy. Wiggy Looking Lady Patient taunts that Brody misses Jessica. He admits he does. Aw, he lurves her.

Zen Center or Motel or Whatever: Dorian covers and says she's not perfect, and if she's not right for him, he should leave her. David then says he secretly ate a BLT at the airport while she was in the bathroom. Dorian cutely says "you did not!" He serenely says he did, and maybe he'll be a pig in his next life, so be it. omg. these two. He says it is not the path to be perfect, but to try to be the best one can be. Dorian earnestly says she is trying.

Buchansion: Rex tells the gathered that he lost David and Dorian.

Stubb's New House: Stubbs explains to Vicki that they have a contract with Dorian. They also explain they are married now. Vicki tries to keep her head from exploding.

Buchansion: Rex continues he lost them at an ashram, and they aren't at her house, or what used to be her house. He apologizes for blowing it and says he'll resign from the case if they want.

Motel?: David says Dorian outed Jared as not really being the Buchanan heir. She thinks she did the Buchs a favor and as far as she knows no one is posing as the actual heir. He muses that someone is out there and a billionaire and doesn't even know it. (my hat)

Commercials

St. Anne's: Brody recaps that when he came to town, he pretended to be a family with Gigi and Shane, but he lied to her and the kid. He says he was living this lie to avoid his past, so he ended up here, fresh out of lies. (Jessica eaveslurks from the doorway, which is remarkably unethical of her, but I want them to fall in love so who cares) Brody says he met Jessica, and he started to feel whole and stuff again, and he never got to tell her. Jessica steps out of hiding and Wiggy Lady Patient mutters "speak of the devil" and asks Jessica if she's going to stay.

Gatehouse: Gigi continues to be an idiot about Shane's perfectly normal looking kid hair. Honestly, it's not remotely scandalous. Roxie leaves, and Shane tells Gigi not to be mad at Roxie b/c it was fun to make her happy, and he likes the hair b/c it reminds him of Rex. (who also has not particularly wacky hair. it's about as basic of a cut as you can get unless you use a bowl)

Stubb's House: Vicki is looking for Dorian b/c she needs help with the ball. Stubb's says they haven't seen her since they left for Vegas. Vicki mutters that the Stubb's may not be the only newlyweds in town.

Motel or somewhere: Dorian and David continue their power struggle about keeping their marriage a secret. This scene is intercut with the Bo/Rex on. Dorian wants to announce their marriage at the Go Red Ball. Dorian says she can cancel, but she has to let Vicki know. David agrees to go to the ball with her. She is jubilant and promises that after tonight, she'll do whatever he wishes, because she really loves him. He says he really loves her too. Then he kisses her forehead. I think she's telling the truth, but I'm still not sure about him. But I never am, and thus my love for him endures.

Buchansion: Bo and Rex continue their bromance as Bo sticks up for Rex, even though he failed at his job. Bo privately tells Rex that he wants him to go to the Ball and do a really bad job there as well. He tells him to bring Gigi and get a tux. Rex says Dorian is in a new mode to give away all her belongings. Bo muses "there is no such animal." heh.

Commercials

Gatehouse: Gigi finally gets over Shane's haircut. Shane says he's lucky to have Rex and Shane. Gigi says having his is the best thing she ever did. She tells him to catch the bus and begs him not to get a tattoo the next time he's with Roxie. Rex shows up because apparently the people in this town do 800 things before school starts. Did they all get up with the roosters? Rex loves the haircut.

St. Anne's: Brody is embarassed that Jessica heard, but she sweetly tells him she misses him too, and it puts such an adorable smile on his face.

Buchansion Exterior: Bo obviously smells the pot smell because there are few odors as distinct and easily recognizable. (though at a Bruce Springstein concert as a kid, I kept telling my mom that somebody had some seriously bad body odor...because I was 12, so why would I know it was just skunk weed?)

LHS: Langston is annoyed that Starr is helping Dillon with a project.

I missed a scene.

Motel: Oh, this is that motel that Roxie runs, I guess. I didn't recognize it for some reason until now. Roxie asks David if he's going commando under his robes. heh. She also says she gives Dorian about a week with the no earthly possessions thing. Dorian says they need a room, and David clarifies they want the smallest room. Dorian tries not to cry. She sends David up to meditate while she runs some errands for the ball. David serenely says "I love you lemon ball." Aw, I want to be called lemon ball! David leaves, and Dorian busts out a horse choking wad of cash. She starts laying $100's down on the table and sternly says no one is to know she and David are there. She keeps laying down bills until Roxie's eyes light up and are satisfied. Roxie happily scoops up her cash and drawls "now that'st the Dorian I know."

Commercials

St. Anne's: Brody and Jessica are in mid discussion about Natalie. Jessica says her daughters love Natalie. She gets a bit sad and says it hurts, and it was easier being crazy in here with him. She sadly says that Natalie said she's more of a mother to Bree than Jessica ever was, and she says it sometimes seems true. Aw.

Llanview HS: Cole has put visine in his eyes and chews gum. Also, he's kind of grumpy with the guy Langston is dating. Why can't I remember his name?

Dillon and Starr talk about their horrible parents.

Gatehouse: Oh, what the hell? Rex managed to go to a meeting AND pick up a dress, all before Shane left for school? What evening gown store is open before 8am? Rex says the Buchs let him put the dress on their expense account. Gigi loves the dress. That blond chick, who I think is called Stacy, lurks from the doorway. I guess she got up at the crack of dawn as well. Early risers, these Llanviewians.

Motel Roxie: I missed what the guy looked like, but he wears one of those leather jackets with the fringe on them and asks Roxie if she's seen David. and then just like on all TV shows, instead of having a reasonable, candid shot of the guy, he has one of Tuc Watkins head shots. All poised and perfectly lit with his head tilted.

Commercials

Stubb'sboulet: Dorian has shown up and overheard Vicki dissing her. Dorian manages to take the high road and says she's transformed and not angry about earthly things. Vicki manages not to laugh in her face, because how do you solve a problem like Dorian? Dorian asks if there is anything to be done with the ball, and Vicki gives her an "only everything" face.

Gatehouse: Rex says he's going to find David and Dorian so they can't ruin the party. Gigi oddly becomes a cheerleader and says "you can do it Balsam!" I don't mean to be so annoyed by Gigi, but I am.

Stubbsboulet: Vicki says there is nothing to do, and since Dorian did the "nothing", Vicki did the "everything" Dorian says Vicki is very enlightened. Oh my hell, Vicki is indeed very enlightened not to give Dorian a knuckle sandwich. Dorian asks if she can borrow one of her dresses to wear.

Motel Roxie: Jacket guy continues to query Roxie about David.

Stubbsboulet: Dorian starts up the stairs and strikes a pose and says she thinks tonight is going to be really special. She asks for Noel's help, and they head upstairs to find a hemp dress and Birkenstocks, I guess. Stubb's tells Vicki that Dorian is up to something, Vicki is all "duh"

Llanview HS: Bo and Nora have shown up to randomly wander the school grounds and accuse Matthew of smoking pot. Backed into a corner, Matthew rats Cole out. Cole overhears.

Starr and Dillon continue their highly inappropriate relationship.

St. Anne's: Jessica sobs that she doesn't feel like Chloe's mother.

Llanview HS: Starr says she held Jessica's baby, and ever since that day, she can't stop thinking about her own baby. Then she grabs hold of her heart shaped necklace.

the end.