GH Recap 2/13: Tiny Nose Ring Punch

Tiny Nose Ring Punch
1 teaspoon sugar
1 1/2 - 2 ounces Jamaican rum
1 ounce lemon juice
1 splash grenadine
2 ounces orange juice
1/2 ounce branch water

Pour all ingredients in a bassinet and ignore them

Jason carries Claud to the little area where Kate is hanging around, awaiting death. Kate does hilariously say "oh, I see you found a Zacchara" as if he found a dead possum or something. Kate warns Jason that Trevor has a Sphere, and Claud is all "oh, yeah, I forgot to tell ya that" Jason is annoyed that Claud didn't say this sooner, and he goes off to save the day and stuff. Kate then snarls at Claud that she kills kids.

Sonny digs Carly out of the rubble, and she tells him not to yell at her.

Fire filled football huddle. Chewbecca continues to yell at Nik to save her. She manages to sound a little less like she's yelling at him as if it's fault this time. Nik finally remembers that he benches about 300 pounds, so he lifts the flimsy cardboard shelf off of her. Her voice actually now sounds reasonably like it's hoarse from smoke inhalation, so I give her points for that. (so, she's now at negative 93989203492 points!) She says she can't believe he just did that. She steadies herself and says he saved her life. OH, so go fall in love and sit on the couch and schmoop to each other endlessly then why don'tcha? But then the ceiling falls on Nik. lol. these idiots.

Liz and Lucky grossly schmoop to each other. As if to mock me for ever making fun and Jason and Liz.

Chewbecca grunts and groans and screams and tries to carry Nik. It is nice of her since he just saved her life. (but also, they wouldn't be here if he wasn't a stalker)

Kate and Claud sit around in their wheelchairs, in a burning building, and gossip about Claud shooting Chucky. Kate says she's going tomake sure Sonny finds out. I suppose she's going to do that by never mentioning it the 50 millionty times seen him since she learned about it?

Sonny and Carly bicker about how to escape, but then they finally decide "standing around the room on fire" is not on the list of smart options.

Maxie talks to herself as she walks up the stairs, trying to force herself to go on. I think the sign on the door said she's only on the 2nd floor, and that is hilarious if she's already tuckered out this early. heh. But it may have said "Stairwell 2" and that might mean something too.

Snowy roof: Trevor and Sam sit around and gossip about plow pox. Trevor thinks that by going up to every single person in the hospital and taunting them with the plow pox that this will somehow translate into his getting a raise, or like a cool car or something. I don't see why it would end in his getting dead, but what do I know?

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Alexis' Office. I think her office has gotten sexier. She's on the phone demanding results. I think she's trying to keep info about the hospital from the media. Diane shows up, b/c who doesn't pop in, in the middle of the night, in a blizzard, to a friend's office, on the off chance they are there still? If I had a nickel... Anyhoo, love them, so who cares. Diane is a good sounding board while Alexis laments that the fatherS of her children, and her male BFF, and her daughter and nephew are there. Diane points out that Jax has some tangential Superjase qualities (never gets the girl for long, saves at least part of the day).

Snowy Roof: Sam goes for broke and asks Trevor to just give her the plow pox. Oddly, this doesn't work. He heads back to the building, but she trains a gun on him and tells him not to go. Trevor says he doesn't think anyone knows what he's really capable of. It would rule of Sam shot him to sacrifice herself to save the hospital. But obviously that's not going to happen b/c then this would be the sort of show that makes people cry. I can't figure out what Trevor thinks his end game is? Even though Gitmo is closing, I'd guess he'd still have to spend at least a few months there for being a super creepy awful terrorist and being on record as being such to EVERYONE he's seen today. so dumb.

Kate and Claud whine fest. Claud angrily says that Sonny knows Dr. Devil shot Chucky. She does a good job of acting like she has no earthly idea what Kate is babbling about. So convincing, that even stupid Kate looks half convinced for a second. heh. This show is so awesomely stupid. Kate tells her "shut up evil shrew" Omg. She totally busted out the Shakespearean word for the b-word. That is cold! Patrick continues to be the only person with half a brain in this building, and he rushes in all out of breath as if something urgent is going on.

Sonny and Carly blah blah don't do anything so why bother showing them?

Maxie mutters and climbs and climbs and mutters. Aw, see, this show is so stupid that now I don't even care if Maxie dies. That's consistent.

Tracy is now full on back in bed. b/c why wouldn't you be strapped to oxygen tanks in an inferno? but whatever, it's a sweet chance for Loo to wander aimlessly in and Tracy to sweetly tell her it's been an honor to be her step monster. and I do sort of love Looloo when she is being a journeywoman to Tracy.

Commercials

Mercy Hospital: Oh, my bad! Tracy and Looloo must be at Mercy I now realize. So, sorry, show! That actually all makes lots of sense. Tracy and Looloo have a lovely little scene whereby the reassure each other that the other's loved ones are safe. Loo tells Tracy that she knows that Tracy is the best ever, even when she tries to pretend that she only pretends to be the best ever. Tracy then adorably drops the mushy stuff and tells Loo to go find out where the hell Luke has been then, because where he has NOT been was saving either one of them. Loo smiles b/c it's always a good sign that Tracy is going to make it when she gets grumpy.

Nik and Chewbecca wander about a bit, but at least Nik is awake now.

Maxie wanders about as well.

Snowy Roof: Nik and Chewbecca have made it to the roof. Patrick has Kate and Claud in wheelchairs. They all stare at Chewbecca, and she sort of hilariously snaps in her Maude voice "I know, I look like Emily, I'm not her" whatever, but also, heh. Jax comes down some other set of stairs and asks about Carly. But they have to take off, I guess.

oh, wait ,what? does this building have 4 roofs? I guess it's sort of like the roof in Die Hard with the helicopter pad on one level and then a lower level around that? So, on a different lower level than the Patrick-y one, Sam and Trevor have an insane conversation. somehting about how he expects to not only not go to Gitmo, but be named a hero? She says he has to give her the poison first, and he says that's the plan. Then he throws the plow pox in the air, so she drops her gun to catch it, but then he picks her up and says "let's go" and throws her over the ledge, but then he also falls past her, while she grabs onto the ledge and the plow pox. and actually, in the hands of a decent director and an actual budget, that's all quite groovy. On this show, the way it was shot...just sort of laughably dorky.

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Alexis' Office: Alexis has some updates on survivors. Diane, of course, is taking adorable thimble sized shots from her flask. Such a lady not to guzzle from the flask, that one! Diane then mutters comically about Kate and Carly getting out. The content may be stupid, but the delivery is delightful as ever. lol, then Diane busts out a SPARE thimble sized flask and gives it to Alexis. Alexis asks if she carries this flask everywhere, even in court. Diane shrugs and asks "but is it working?" Alexis takes a shot and says no. Then she sits and talks about how she's messed up with Kristina. whatever, unless she gets cast by a terrible actress, Kristina has the capacity to rule. Alexis beats herself up for giving up Sam, b/c she never would have considered it with her other two daughters. Diane squints and pauses and sagely says you can't live a life of regret. Alexis promises to do better henceforth.

Ambulance bay: Nadine and Shawn Douglas hang out in an ambulance. He's blaming himself still and doesn't want to leave. Then he says "besides, the chocolate pudding at Mercy sucks" Nadine blinks at him as she does when she's being lovely, fun Nadine and pretends to be annoyed that he's making jokes. hmmm, cute chemistry. just saying. (don't make them be idiots, though.)

Carly and Sonny and maybe Jax all run around while the aggravating Sweeps Music plays.

PCPD Shack: Raynor shows up. omg. LMAO. They made Kate and Claud go to the shack and not directly to Mercy? lol, like BOTH these women don't have extra lawyers that would be there. Raynor wants to question them. Claud says she knows Trevor has a poison to kill everyone. Raynor says they just found his dead body, and he guesses he jumped to avoid being burned to death.

Super Realistic Look At Hypothermia: So Sam has been hanging, BY ONE HAND this whole time. She has the plow pox in the other. She finally can't hang on, so she takes the plow pox hand and sets the plow pox down (it's just that very delicate sphere now, not even with the protective case), so she can hold on with both hands. Jason comes out and looks around, and obviously nothing is there, but he looks around anyway...but then he shrugs like 'oh, I give up' because darren aronsfsky is guest directing, I guess. Just then, Sam gasps as she tries to pull herself up, and even though it's a roof top in a blizzard, and you can never hear Sam when she's yelling, Superjase heard this and turns abruptly back to the ledge.

Commercials

Alexis's Office: Diane and her thimble was trying to "secretly" look at Alexis' files, but she's half drunk and not very sneaky. Alexis numbly asks what she's doing, and Diane admits to being busted. As you'd have to admit to having a nose if asked. Diane wants to read stuff about Bobbie and Mike b/c she has drawn up the wills for Sonny and Carly. Alexis says if they die, she'll make sure Diane gets their contact info. Then Diane drunkenly starts slurring about how she's doesn't want to hear about how Sonny is in bed, but she's sure he's great, but she won't go there. Alexis just watches her drunken friend and nods and says "good for you. I wish I'd exercised that self control" Diane is now wobbling her thimble all over the place and assures Alexis it's going to be okay. Alexis is dubious about Diane's optimism.

One of the snowy rooftops: Oh, Jason saw Sam's gun, maybe he didn't hear her. but when he picks up the gun, it activates his Superjase Hearing, and then he hears her and pulls her to safety.

Liz and Lucky remind me why I never have liked them since J. Jackson left the show.

Ambulance: Nadine and Shawn D continue to be entertaining. Shawn looks kind of drunk, but I'm sure he's going for "near death" Patrick walks up, and the Brothers Drake have a sweet moment of recognizing that neither one abandoned the other. Nadine looks very forlorn and asks about rebuilding GH. Well, the three of you are a reasonable start. If only everyone left in the building could die! oh, she meant the actual sets. nevermind. Patrick looks even more in need of a nap than Jason does on most days. He deserves one! He talks about his wife and child and all that happened, in this drowsy, stunned way that makes me want to hug him. He finally snaps out of it and says "let's go to Mercy" Just then annoying Raynor shows up to take Patrick to that stupid darkened room and ask him questions for a few hours. It would be cool if Patrick just kicked him in the chin and closed the ambulance doors, but we all know that doesn't happen.

Mercy: Tracy and Loo gossip about Johnny. booo!

GH exterior: Somehow Carly and Sonny made it down the stairs and out the door. A fi er fy tur gives her a blanket. Piano Guy lets the music swell ridiculously, and he says she's a fighter. Oh, how I love to watch Sonny and Carly be in love. Please make them a couple!!!!! PPPPllllleeeeaaaawssssseeeeee (I'm trying a new thing whereby I embrace what I hate and hate what I love about this show)

Commercials

Ambulance: Shawn Douglas is still slurring saying he should be talking to the FBI, not his brother, and he then he oddly wonders when the FBI started overruling doctors. He tries to get up to talk, but Nadine insists he sit down and says they are going to Mercy now. Just then Nik shows up with his dead ex-wife and asks if there is room. Aw, Nadine, I'm very grateful to you for being so annoying the past few weeks after being so adorable for the weeks prior. I have some bad news for you. Does the name "Chloe Morgan" mean anything to you?

Carly and Jax find each other and embrace.

PCPD Shack: Sonny enters and Claud embraces him, saying she was worried. Kate just stares instead of saying "um, she shot your son"

Roof: Jason pulls up Sam, but in the process knocks off the plow pox. but then Sam screams "the poison!" so he dives his hand off the ledge, and of course catches it! and I'd mock it, but it's not even the dumbest thing that happened in all of this.

the end