Today's recommended drink for getting through the show:
A Port Charles ScrewLoo
equal parts vodka and orange juice
dash of bitters
pour over ice in a glass about the size of her chin
GH: Jason and Sam kibbitz that she shot him in the shoulder. I think it's supposed to be comical.
Snowy Forest: Robin is walking her baby in the effing snow to get to the hospital. Sing it with me IN A BLIZZARD.
GH HalL: Tracy gasps for breath, and Patrick tends to her.
Claud's Room: Sonny mumble-asks how she feels. He asks her to repeat what she said about Wheels shooting Kate. Sonny does his best stern, scary voice and says she needs to be sure about that b/c she knows what happens next. (um, nothing particularly interesting?)
Credit
GH: Sam angrily says "you SAID take the shot" he say that he meant as a diversion. She says that he always says what he means. He says that it was an impossible shot. She says that it's not her fault he stepped into the line of fire. Aw. I think I smell Chinese food.
Claud's room: claud explains the impossibly complicated plan to shoot Kate and then like in that story about for want of a nail the kingdom was lost...it all ends with Sonny killing Jason and then being vulnerable. lol. I"ve seen less convoluted Escher paintings.
GH Hall: Tracy gets wheeled away. Carly tells Patrick she is suddenly not sure how this plow pox works. pssst, Carly: totally randomly with no adherence to the laws of physics. Patrick explains this, and Carly half tearfully realizes that anyone in the board room is in danger.
Liz's Room: Nik visits to wish Liz well and chastise Lucky for breaking into the hospital. Chewbecca shows up to lurk outside the doorway with a nurse. Does she think Liz's room in an elevator or a cell phone?
Stupid Snowy Night: Robin finally decides that killing her baby in a snowy forest is a bad idea, and she should have just killed her in the broken car, but now she's lost. But fortunately, she's still remarkably stupid.
Commercials
Johnny's Car: Johnny and Maxie drive IN A BLIZZARD. Johnny jokes about global warming. Maxie hilariously makes a case that would please even Al Gore, but she says it was really Georgie who taught her about it. Johnny doesn't want to be alone with Maxie. She says she feels guilty, even though they shouldn't b/c they didn't do anything. Johnny says he feels guilty for using her to self destruct. She says she feels bad about hurting Spinelli, and even feels bad for kissing Looloo's boyfriend. He says they shouldn't feel bad. She says he's right b/c they didn't have sex and never will. But then they share a glance and clearly neither of them really feel like taking an oath on this subject.
GH: Piph has sewed up Jason's wound. Sam and Jason continue to george and gracie about this stupid gun shot wound. Spinelli rushes in to warn of impending doom.
Nurse's Station: Patrick tells Raynor that Tracy has passed out. He doesn't know if this is a delayed reaction, or if the plow pox is in the ventillation system. They bicker a bit. Raynor idiotically asks him about the remaining spheres and where the missing one is. Why wouldn't there be a team of Jack Bauer's trying to assess just this question?
Liz's Room: oh, Lili will be so glad to hear that the 3 remaining Scooby Doo'ers want to meet for dinner of ribs and brownies. Meanwhile Chewbecca still hangs out in the hall. But neither Liz, Lucky nor Nik notice. Nik wants to leave Nadine out. Aw, poor Nadine. She won't have to sit around and suffer while these idiots tell the same 3 stories for the 85th time.
Claud's Room: Claud knows what happens next. She knows she would be next on the list after Jason and Sonny, and maybe Johnny in time. Can someone tell me why someone can't just shoot Jason or Sonny? Or poison them? Why do you have to marry off your daughter, and shoot a random magazine mogul and chase away Russians....I mean....this is very complicated. This is the exact opposite of Bikini Girl.
Commercials
GH Lobby: Edward tells Carly that he won't the donors off the hook and will make sure they pay into the Chucky Corinthos Whole Foods Research Project. Carly is very appreciative and asks about Monica. She gently tells him that Tracy is also sick. Edward scoffs and says she's probably just flirting with a doctor. She assures him it's true, and says Patrick was there and immediately took her to ICU. John Ingle rather wonderfully puts on a grumpy face and then gets angry at everyone for not knowing what they are doing. Carly very sweetly understands that he's upset about his family and kindly rubs his shoulder and says "I know." Aw. very nice scene.
Claud's room: Claud has her back turned to Wheels while he once again LOUDLY threatens her life. Sonny walks in and says he has some bizinez with Wheels. Claud is tearful b/c she doesn't want her father dead (for some bizarre reason).
Nurse's station: Patrick yells at Raynor that he's just looking out for Hallifiction. Raynor says he's in the dark b/c this matter is above his clearance. the hell? So people know about this but they've still just left Jason and Sam in charge? Couldn't they at least dress the regular cast up in storm trooper outfits to make it SEEM like the United States or NY government still exists? okay, and then it gets super awesome stupid. Raynor tells Weenie to lead a team to the warehouse. I've heard strippers on Howard Stern who are not as stupid as all of this. and these are women who when asked "what is 10% of 100?" answer 50. or: What is the capital of California: "USA" maybe you don't know it's Sacramento. I have no fault with that....but USA? But still, that girl? Not as stupid as this story line.
Maxie and Johnny are out of the car.
Robin is freezing.
Commercials
Who designed Robin's neighborhood? Why did they put an infinite forest in the middle of it? Also? where's a nice abandoned cabin when you really need one!
GH very ugly room: Wheels asks Sonny what was so important. Sonny very realistically pulls a gun OUT OF HIS SCRUBS POCKET. lmao. But no one noticed this in the very thin layer of cotton pants until now. Sonny points the gun and tells Wheels to stand and take it like a Feets or sit and take it like a coward. Wheels very delightfully puts on an impressive display of feeble old mandedness. He points out how illogical it would be for him to shoot some fashion broad. He says Sonny is playing right into Claud's hands.
Snowy Infinite Forest: oh, I see, Maxie and Johnny found Robin's minivan. and just like how everyone knows when Emily's birthday is, everyone in town also apparently has everyone else's license plate numbers memorized, and they know this is Robin's van. They are concerned.
GH; Spinelli and Patrick bicker about the Plow Pox Plotters. Patrick yells at Spinelli that they have to get the rest of the spheres out of the hospital. um, because then he can kill everyone in town? Why not put them in a thermos, or something? or, I don't know WHY NOT PUT THEM BACK IN BRAGG'S STUPID BODY? or, heck, wrap them in Jason and Sam's leather jacket b/c that is clearly the most impermeable thing ever invented. Jason yells at Spinelli to stop fighting about this.
GH Lobby: Carly and Edward continue to have a totally adorable and sweet conversation about the fear of losing a loved one.
GH other Lobby: Spinelli wants to run off and deal with stuff. But Ubiquitous Sam is there to reason that if Spinelli gets hurt, Jason will implode or something.
GH doors: So, then Weenie and her stupid team of TWO show up, and Patrick opens the door. He forgot to say "hey toxin, look over there!" though, so I'm not sure the world is safe. Why would the FBI show up 18 weeks later to try to contain a biotoxin? This is making me feel guilty about not appreciating how Brownie was indeed doing a heckuva a job. Spinelli lurks around a corner. Oh my hell. Did Patrick really leave the keys to the stupid door in the lock?
Commercials
So is the hospital full of dum dums? Or did Piph cleverly dose everyone with horse tranquilizer? Why is no one particularly complaining about being trapped? Why do they all get to roam free and not be contained?
Liz's Room: Lucky creepily says he's staring at Liz, trying to memorize her face, so he can keep her with him. Dude, really? You haven't bothered to learn what she looks like during the duration of YOUR ENTIRE ADULT LIFE? Lucky makes me smile when he says really dopey things. Nik says "I know, it's like when it's all about me and my feelings." then he says he thought he saw Emily earlier. Lucky manages not to say "oh, I can't handle it if you have a brain tumor again", so Lucky is still a better sibling than Looloo.
Tracy's Room: Edward sadly sits by his hospital and lists all the people he's lost in the past few years. now Monica, now Tracy. He tells her that this should take him before her. He calls himself an old fool and says he didn't tell her enough that he loves her. He says he loves her and is proud of her. "You are the last child that is left to me,a nd I can't stand to lose you." Tracy makes a little gasp and then says "you make me sick" Edward's face relaxes gloriously, and he says with great relief "oh, oh, that's my girl' hee! so cute
Stupid Room with the Stupider Spheres: Weenie and her stupid "team" of two enter. Oh, no, sorry, one team member enters...and then another team member enters, but he politely left on his tale tell boots, so we know he's Cahoots.
Claud's Room: Claud and someone, I guess Carly, chat about Sonny and Wheels.
Random Very Ugly Room: Sonny and Wheels fight. Wheels has the old, sad grandpa thing working, but Sonny isn't buying. He says he can't walk, so Sonny points the gun at his legs and says theyshould test it. But Sonny is not very bright at all, and he lets Wheels talk and talk and talk, like he's a former Illinois governor on a certain late night talk show. Sonny is no more convinced than Dave was, but he's infinitely less cool, and mean and awesome about it. Jason walks in and chides Sonny that he can't kill Wheels.
Infinite Snowy Forest: Maxie and Johnny look for Robin. Johnny wisely says they have to turn back now while they still see their footprints. Maxie will not let another loved one die, and she insists they keep moving. She manages to see her cousin's form...IN A BLIZZARD....AT NIGHT. but whatever. I really couldn't bear Maxie's losing another family member, so I'm glad Robin won't die tonight. Johnny uncovers Robin. because, see...IN A BLIZZARD, you can get covered in snow, even if you are as big as a human being b/c it snows a LOT IN A BLIZZARD.
Commercials
Ugly GH room: Sonny explains that Wheels is lying and is really a Feets and also shot Kate. Jason is surprised. wha wha wahhhhat? There is something to be known that Jason didn't know. I feel very lost. Wheels begs and cries. Jason listens and is conflicted but he tells Sonny he can't shoot him b/c "you know why I need Wheels alive" Wheels sobs "yes! you need me alive! why do you need me alive?" heh. Jason and Sonny struggle with the gun, and Wheels busts into Feets mode and runs out of the room. Sonny and Jason tussle ont he ground, and Sonny shoots after Feets, but only hits the doorway.
GH: Patrick and Nik talk. Nik says he's worried about Liz, so he'll pull some favors to make things happen. Patrick thanks him and says he'll return the favor. He says he knows what NIk is going through with Emily, but he RUDELY doesn't have a bouquet of flowers and a card in honor of Emily's birthday. Chewbecca finally found her phone and wanders around aimlesslyin the background. She's all "I KNOW Bikini Girl was ROBBED"
Oh, sorry, NOW Maxie and Johnny find Robin. I guess it was a whiney stump that they found before. my bad.
the end
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Pree Vee Us Lee on General Hospital...
Previously: The Steelers and the Cards played a helluva a game. Rob Blago thought going on David Letterman was a good idea, even though old school Dave would rip the likes of Marilu Henner a new a-hole for the crime of being kind of boring, and Jessica Simpson finally ate a cheeseburger.
Johnny and Maxie found an abandoned garage, and I'm pretty sure it's the one Alison, Livie and Jamal used to own when they were vampires. They got drunk on a case of Dark Ale and commiscerated about how they are not bad, but they are drawn that way. Johnny knows Looloo will be sad when she finds out he was involved in Michael's shooting, and Maxie knows she's never going to like like Spinelli, so she's going to break his heart, so they decided the noble thing to do was sleep together, because then the heartbreak would be out of the way. But then, alas, they remembered that they are actually pretty decent people, so they didn't sleep together, but they did learn to respect and like each other a lot more than previously.
The FBI, and federal government, and NY national guard, and the CDC all were on vacation, so they left Jason and Sam in charge of an epidemic, and Jason and Sam are too doltish to think that maybe someone should guard the deadly, deadly toxin, so someone stole some, but the person who stole it is even dumber b/c for some reason he didn't just go ahead and take all of it.
Patrick used Layla to get over Robin, but then he felt bad, and then she became kind of lovable, but then she died, after telling Patrick that she'd found love. and then her cute fiance showed up and learned she was dead, and it was actually very touching and sad b/c he told Patrick about how Layla had a broken heart, and Patrick knew he'd broken it. And then Sam and her Leathered Ubiquity showed up b/c it's apparently ILLEGAL for anyone to go more than 5 minutes without dealing with Sam in some fashion or another. (and this was carried out to such a comical degree that Sam even had to get her own LAPTOP and play dueling laptops with Spinelli)
Liz got very sick from the plow pox, and Lucky broke into the quarantined hospital to be with her b/c, as he tells Sam and Looloo, he and Liz are always there for each other when times are hard, but he left out that part that sometimes he and Liz cheat on each other when times are hard, but no one has ever accused Lucky of being captain of the debate team.
Looloo, who has survived a previous monkey pox, spent all her time whining about her boyfriend instead of being remotely concerned about her loved ones in peril. She was so disgusting and awful, that, by comparison, Carly seemed like the most nurturing and competent person you have ever met. Then Piph showed up and gave Looloo a very satisfying dressing down and put her lazy, whiny tush to work.
Robin was annoying and apparently never heard of singing to a baby and instead just griped at her kid to stop crying.
Patrick continued to become my favorite character by being believably worried about his wife, but then Sam called the Haz Mat Suit people b/c of COURSE Sam just happens to have the Haz Mat Suit people's phone number.
Johnny and Maxie found an abandoned garage, and I'm pretty sure it's the one Alison, Livie and Jamal used to own when they were vampires. They got drunk on a case of Dark Ale and commiscerated about how they are not bad, but they are drawn that way. Johnny knows Looloo will be sad when she finds out he was involved in Michael's shooting, and Maxie knows she's never going to like like Spinelli, so she's going to break his heart, so they decided the noble thing to do was sleep together, because then the heartbreak would be out of the way. But then, alas, they remembered that they are actually pretty decent people, so they didn't sleep together, but they did learn to respect and like each other a lot more than previously.
The FBI, and federal government, and NY national guard, and the CDC all were on vacation, so they left Jason and Sam in charge of an epidemic, and Jason and Sam are too doltish to think that maybe someone should guard the deadly, deadly toxin, so someone stole some, but the person who stole it is even dumber b/c for some reason he didn't just go ahead and take all of it.
Patrick used Layla to get over Robin, but then he felt bad, and then she became kind of lovable, but then she died, after telling Patrick that she'd found love. and then her cute fiance showed up and learned she was dead, and it was actually very touching and sad b/c he told Patrick about how Layla had a broken heart, and Patrick knew he'd broken it. And then Sam and her Leathered Ubiquity showed up b/c it's apparently ILLEGAL for anyone to go more than 5 minutes without dealing with Sam in some fashion or another. (and this was carried out to such a comical degree that Sam even had to get her own LAPTOP and play dueling laptops with Spinelli)
Liz got very sick from the plow pox, and Lucky broke into the quarantined hospital to be with her b/c, as he tells Sam and Looloo, he and Liz are always there for each other when times are hard, but he left out that part that sometimes he and Liz cheat on each other when times are hard, but no one has ever accused Lucky of being captain of the debate team.
Looloo, who has survived a previous monkey pox, spent all her time whining about her boyfriend instead of being remotely concerned about her loved ones in peril. She was so disgusting and awful, that, by comparison, Carly seemed like the most nurturing and competent person you have ever met. Then Piph showed up and gave Looloo a very satisfying dressing down and put her lazy, whiny tush to work.
Robin was annoying and apparently never heard of singing to a baby and instead just griped at her kid to stop crying.
Patrick continued to become my favorite character by being believably worried about his wife, but then Sam called the Haz Mat Suit people b/c of COURSE Sam just happens to have the Haz Mat Suit people's phone number.
Friday, January 30, 2009
GH Recap 1/30: Can The Shark Jump a Show?
Previously on General Hospital, we learned that either the writing staff does not understand what "air born" means, or the writing staff doesn't know what "air" is or where "air" is. (Hint : everywhere)
We also learned the Port Charles has a beer delivery service, much like the old milk man service, and the service is free to mechanic's garages that are abandoned enough to hide out in, but not so abandoned that they don't have light or heat. I smell Dharma Initiative!
Benefit: Sonny lays Kate down on the ground and asks for help. Nadine jumps to action, but Claud claims Kate is faking. We see a shot of the vent. OH, that's right, because this 48 story hospital has duct work that goes all floppity floo all over the place. Next we see the duct in the OR. Also, there are gauges that talk about Nitrogen and "air" lol. So, they've HEARD of the word air.
Jason tells Raynor about the remarkably unrealistic ductwork, and Raynor tells JASON to seal off the room. I guess he's supposed to use all the zippers on his and Sam's jackets? Why not call the CDC? Or, I dunno, Home Depot for that matter b/c they at least sell plastic and duct tape. Whatever. Jason asks about the people inside.
Credits.
Haunted Star: Luke catches someone robbing the joint. A boy who has to be Dante turns around and asks crazily if Luke is a gambling man?
GH Hall: Loo tolerates Nik talking about someone besides herself for a few moments while Nik insists he saw Emily at the nurse's station.
Emma's Palace: Robin stands over her baby and talks to her like she's a chess game. She won't pick up Emma b/c she has some bizarre notion that Emma has really complicated opinions about Robin's mothering skills as opposed to really uncomplicated opinions about the load in her diaper and the rumbling in her tummy.
Cafe Interrogate/GH Phone call: Raynor wants Spinelli to hack into the hospital's duct system. Is it computerized? the hell? It's just a series of metal tubes. Whatever. Maybe Spinelli can turn all all the video cameras in the ducts as well! Also, why not call THE MAINTENANCE PEOPLE at the effing hospital?
GH Hall: sam runs after Patrick b/c she has a lot of places to be at once if she's going to be in Everyone's Business by the end of the show. She wants to go and turn off the toxin or something idiotic like that, and she should go b/c Patrick has a family. Why would the toxin have an off switch? Why would they wait until now to hit it? Why doesn't the CDC exist?
Benefit: Carly tries to go for help, but Jason has "sealed" her in, and I think he "sealed" her in by sticking a broom handle through the door knobs. I'm sure it's a hermetic broom handle though. Carly asks what's the big idea and says Kate collapsed. But because the door is sealed so tightly, all Jason hears is ever single word she says very clearly.
Commercials
Haunted Star: Hey, why does Dante have an accent? He says he picked the lock and came in to get out of the storm. Luke lowers his gun. Dante says he can tell Luke needs a professional, and he's the best bartender ever. Luke says he likes a Naked Nymph and says it's a drink. I wonder how it differs from a Naked Jason.
Emma's Palace: Mac visits Robin because there is a blizzard, and that's the best time to drive across town. Mac says he knows she's a great mom, and he doesn't mean to hover. She says it's great he's here. Emma cries through the monitor, and Robin lies she just woke up. He goes to finally give Emma some affection.
GH: Raynor continues to ask Spinelli to hack into some metal tubes. Oh, nevermind, Raynor wanted him to hack into the ventillation system to turn it off. Because going to the off switch would take so long, I guess? Raynor explains it's an air born toxin and it can get on your hair or clothes and kill you. Sam looks like she swallowed a bug (because of course Sam just had to find Spinelli so she could randomly take the phone from him to randomly be involved with the FBI who randomly is counting on a mobster and a geek to solve this impossibly dangerous crisis...also, by FBI, I mean one dude hanging out in the interrogation room of the local police department. This plot reminds me of a fine Swiss cheese).
Tiny Room for a Crappy Benefit Because Carly Didn't Really Care About Michael All That Much: Jason explains there is a toxin. I don't understand why people understand the word "air born" one minute, but then don't the next? Why does Jason not understand that "air" can go under doors? Everyone wants to leave the Crappy Benefit, but they can't because there is air in the room, but not outside the room? Or maybe it's because someone finally figured out that because Kate has been exposed, Jason and Sam shouldn't just hang out around her without hazmat suits?
OR Room: See, now Patrick DOES understand about air born b/c he's in a haz mat suit. But he just stands around breathing and looking at stuff. He's probably wishing the CDC had been invented.
Commercials
Haunted Starr: Oh, it's not Dante. It's Ethan. He's from Australia. He very aggravatingly does this annoying thing with a napkin...like he's bouncing it. Luke says the drink is correct, but it's bright blue, so I can't fathom that it's tasty. He orders an Androgynous Apollo, and what in the hell are they talking about? blah blah they joke about the West coast version having sushi in it. I hate stupid made up drinks. Vomit, the Androgynous Apollo looks like bourbon with olives in it. I wuld kill myself before drinking that. Ethan asks who Luke is, and Luke tells him,but smiles that Ethan already knew that. So, is Ethan a Scorpio or a Jacks?
Emma's Palace: Robin starts to tell Mac her concern about her problems. She says she was supposed to go to a Benefit. She asks Mac to stay with Emma so she can go. In a blizzard, mind you!
GH: Nik and Loo loo show up and Nik oddly says that they haven't heard anything about the Plow Pox. Sam explains how blah blah Bragg was in a car accident and brought bio toxins in vials in his body. Sam says it's a weapons grade poison and two people have already died. Nik asks if it's been contained. Sam says it got into the ducts. For some reason she doesn't add "oh, and I'm totally covered in it" Nik and Loo realize that they know people in the room that is bizarrely linked to an OR by a vent. I mean, let's just pretend there isn't Plow Pox. Wouldn't it be VERY dangerous to the OR patient if someone in the board room had a cold and sneezed?
Benefit Room: So now the genius plan is to open the door really quickly and shove Kate out and then close the door really quick. Sonny cleverly draws what appears to be a black tunnel on the wall next to the door, so the toxin thinks THAT is the way out. Meep Meep! Wheels laughs that they are all going to die with the people they hate.
OR: oh, so in a remarkably stupid move, Patrick is taking the remaining spheres of Plow Pox out of Bragg. Aren't they pretty well contained in his body? It would only be a problem if he dropped one or cut into one, I would think. but then, I idiotically also adhere to the laws of physics, so what do I know?
Commercials
Haunted Starr: Ethan says he's never heard of Luke and asks if he's a local celebrity. Luke says he just owns a bar. Luke is getting loopy from all the stupid fancy drinks Ethan has made him, so he finally orders a scotch, neat. Ethan seems to know that the HS is only open sporadically. Luke says work should be fun, so he opens when he feels like it. Luke says Ethan can't be a card shark (or is it sharp?) and says only he fleeces his flock. Then he starts to get sleepy, while Ethan wipes down the bar.
Emma's Palace: Mac reasonably doesn't want his neice to go gallavanting about in a blizzard. Also, why would they not have canceled the benefit to avoid people DYING on the way there? Mac agrees, but he gets a call from the station.
GH Lobby: Patrick has met up with Sam and Spinelli and The Phone and tells Raynor he got the spheres out. I don't understand any of this? Why did he take the spheres out but have nowhere to put them? Raynor says the FBI will take over. Well, GET ON IT, Dude, geeze. Patrick says that Raynor better neutralize the toxin b/c it took out an entire OR in seconds.
Benefit: Trevor starts to lose his mind and screams at the doorway to be let out. Carly tells him to get a grip. Sonny yells at Claud for saying Kate was pretending to be sick. Claud laughs that she's a b.itch.
Jason calls Carly to say they are doing the best they can.
Wheels says the toxin is a paralytic, and he can tell you just how it will make you feel. Trevor stands by the door, gasping for breath. Claud watches with a smile on her face. Carly looks disgusted. Suddenly Trevor collapses and Carly calls for help.
GH Hall: Nik finds Jason and says Nadine is in the boardroom and wants to get her out. Jason explains that they already tried the old fake train track tunnel trick on the toxin, so there's no way to safely open the door again. Or, actually AT ALL, but whatever. or actually, it's just a door with a gap between the door and the frame, but what really matters is Nik panicks and tries to open the door, and Jaosn stops hiim and Nik sadly says he was chasing a dream earlier and left Nadine there. I keep wishing sharks would show up and eat everyone. That would be cool. They could be air born sharks.
GH Lobby: Sam yammers about something because while she was in law school she learned about disease containment, I guess? I don't know. This show is what would happen if Passions and a cruise ship on Days of Our Lives had a baby.
Commercials
Haunted Starr: Luke is drunk, or pretending to be and says he doesn't believvvvvvve in coincidences and that Ethan has never heard of him after being here for 48 hours. Luke has a point b/c being in Port Charles for 48 hours, I expect Ethan to know it's Emily's birthday. Luke warns Ethan not to get caught up in people's agendas. He yawns and says he has to learn how to see opportunities. LUke lays his head down on the table saying you have to answer when Opportunity knocks. Luke lays his head down with his hand clutching his gun though. Ethan says his sentiments exactly and smiles.
Emma's Palace: Mac has to leave b/c there is an incident, but Raynor wouldn't give him details, but there may be casualties. Robin and her Not Fooling Anyone pony tails prepars to hunker down for another night of ignoring her baby.
GH Hall: Jason wonders if Nik means Emily. Nik says he's not hallucinating, he saw a woman who looked like Emily. Jason says Nik has to get it together b/c it's all going to get a lot worse.
Benefit Room: So they open both doors for about 4 hours as Trevor gets sloooooowwwwwllllllllllyyyyyyy wheeled out, and then Ric holds the door open for another 3 hours watching him being wheeled away. They have put up a plastic curtain, l ike the kind that leads behind the deli counter in a supermarket, so obviously air born toxins can't get past that!
Then hilariously everyone starts having "private conversation" even though this room is smaller than any of their closets. Carly and Sonny, of course, find solace in each other's arms.
GH Lobby: Piph yells at Patrick and Sam about what is going on, and Sam says "I think we should close the OR" oh for fuck's sake. They haven't done that yet? lmao. Is some poor schmoe having his appendectomy in Plow Pox right now? Raynor calls, but somehow this time he calls on a GH line instead of The Phone. Patrick explains about how the OR team died, or is in ICU (thus infecting everyone that goes in or out of the ICU) and then Raynor demands that they quarantine the hospital. and by that, I can only assume he means TWO HOURS AGO when this became an issue, right? Like when he called Patrick to say "watch out for Bragg" he MUST have said, "and quarantine the hospital!" But then for some reason Patrick turns back to Jason, who raises his eyebrows, as if he was able to hear the quarantine order over the phone that he's not talking on. I hate everything about this episode.
Commercials
Haunted Starr: Ethan gently takes the gun from Luke and takes out the bullets. Of COURSE Ethan is the kind of doosh who wears his wallet on a bike chain. Ethan goes behind the bar and picks up the bricks of cash. But of course Luke was pretending to be passed out and has the gun again and tells Ethan they are back where they started.
GH: Patrick makes an announcement that the hospital is under quarantine. He blathers they are doing everything. Meanwhile, the Plow Pox spheres are sitting in a metal bowl, completely unguarded, in the OR. and some dude in a hazmat suit walks in and looks at them.
Benefit: For some bizarre reason, or....I guess I should say: Completely in keeping with the amount of realism on this show, Claud suddenly just HAS to tell Sonny who shot Kate. But she collapses just at that moment. Maybe there is no Plow Pox. Maybe it's just Sonny's toxic personality that is killing everyone?
GH: Random Dude tries to leave, but Piph tells him he can't. And then Jason and Sam stand at the doorway and stare out at the snow as Patrick says no one can leave. But until someone bothers to lock all the doors, I don't know how they plan to stop them? Unless it's by use of the moat, full of sharks, that has clearly sprung up overnight around the hospital.
The End
We also learned the Port Charles has a beer delivery service, much like the old milk man service, and the service is free to mechanic's garages that are abandoned enough to hide out in, but not so abandoned that they don't have light or heat. I smell Dharma Initiative!
Benefit: Sonny lays Kate down on the ground and asks for help. Nadine jumps to action, but Claud claims Kate is faking. We see a shot of the vent. OH, that's right, because this 48 story hospital has duct work that goes all floppity floo all over the place. Next we see the duct in the OR. Also, there are gauges that talk about Nitrogen and "air" lol. So, they've HEARD of the word air.
Jason tells Raynor about the remarkably unrealistic ductwork, and Raynor tells JASON to seal off the room. I guess he's supposed to use all the zippers on his and Sam's jackets? Why not call the CDC? Or, I dunno, Home Depot for that matter b/c they at least sell plastic and duct tape. Whatever. Jason asks about the people inside.
Credits.
Haunted Star: Luke catches someone robbing the joint. A boy who has to be Dante turns around and asks crazily if Luke is a gambling man?
GH Hall: Loo tolerates Nik talking about someone besides herself for a few moments while Nik insists he saw Emily at the nurse's station.
Emma's Palace: Robin stands over her baby and talks to her like she's a chess game. She won't pick up Emma b/c she has some bizarre notion that Emma has really complicated opinions about Robin's mothering skills as opposed to really uncomplicated opinions about the load in her diaper and the rumbling in her tummy.
Cafe Interrogate/GH Phone call: Raynor wants Spinelli to hack into the hospital's duct system. Is it computerized? the hell? It's just a series of metal tubes. Whatever. Maybe Spinelli can turn all all the video cameras in the ducts as well! Also, why not call THE MAINTENANCE PEOPLE at the effing hospital?
GH Hall: sam runs after Patrick b/c she has a lot of places to be at once if she's going to be in Everyone's Business by the end of the show. She wants to go and turn off the toxin or something idiotic like that, and she should go b/c Patrick has a family. Why would the toxin have an off switch? Why would they wait until now to hit it? Why doesn't the CDC exist?
Benefit: Carly tries to go for help, but Jason has "sealed" her in, and I think he "sealed" her in by sticking a broom handle through the door knobs. I'm sure it's a hermetic broom handle though. Carly asks what's the big idea and says Kate collapsed. But because the door is sealed so tightly, all Jason hears is ever single word she says very clearly.
Commercials
Haunted Star: Hey, why does Dante have an accent? He says he picked the lock and came in to get out of the storm. Luke lowers his gun. Dante says he can tell Luke needs a professional, and he's the best bartender ever. Luke says he likes a Naked Nymph and says it's a drink. I wonder how it differs from a Naked Jason.
Emma's Palace: Mac visits Robin because there is a blizzard, and that's the best time to drive across town. Mac says he knows she's a great mom, and he doesn't mean to hover. She says it's great he's here. Emma cries through the monitor, and Robin lies she just woke up. He goes to finally give Emma some affection.
GH: Raynor continues to ask Spinelli to hack into some metal tubes. Oh, nevermind, Raynor wanted him to hack into the ventillation system to turn it off. Because going to the off switch would take so long, I guess? Raynor explains it's an air born toxin and it can get on your hair or clothes and kill you. Sam looks like she swallowed a bug (because of course Sam just had to find Spinelli so she could randomly take the phone from him to randomly be involved with the FBI who randomly is counting on a mobster and a geek to solve this impossibly dangerous crisis...also, by FBI, I mean one dude hanging out in the interrogation room of the local police department. This plot reminds me of a fine Swiss cheese).
Tiny Room for a Crappy Benefit Because Carly Didn't Really Care About Michael All That Much: Jason explains there is a toxin. I don't understand why people understand the word "air born" one minute, but then don't the next? Why does Jason not understand that "air" can go under doors? Everyone wants to leave the Crappy Benefit, but they can't because there is air in the room, but not outside the room? Or maybe it's because someone finally figured out that because Kate has been exposed, Jason and Sam shouldn't just hang out around her without hazmat suits?
OR Room: See, now Patrick DOES understand about air born b/c he's in a haz mat suit. But he just stands around breathing and looking at stuff. He's probably wishing the CDC had been invented.
Commercials
Haunted Starr: Oh, it's not Dante. It's Ethan. He's from Australia. He very aggravatingly does this annoying thing with a napkin...like he's bouncing it. Luke says the drink is correct, but it's bright blue, so I can't fathom that it's tasty. He orders an Androgynous Apollo, and what in the hell are they talking about? blah blah they joke about the West coast version having sushi in it. I hate stupid made up drinks. Vomit, the Androgynous Apollo looks like bourbon with olives in it. I wuld kill myself before drinking that. Ethan asks who Luke is, and Luke tells him,but smiles that Ethan already knew that. So, is Ethan a Scorpio or a Jacks?
Emma's Palace: Robin starts to tell Mac her concern about her problems. She says she was supposed to go to a Benefit. She asks Mac to stay with Emma so she can go. In a blizzard, mind you!
GH: Nik and Loo loo show up and Nik oddly says that they haven't heard anything about the Plow Pox. Sam explains how blah blah Bragg was in a car accident and brought bio toxins in vials in his body. Sam says it's a weapons grade poison and two people have already died. Nik asks if it's been contained. Sam says it got into the ducts. For some reason she doesn't add "oh, and I'm totally covered in it" Nik and Loo realize that they know people in the room that is bizarrely linked to an OR by a vent. I mean, let's just pretend there isn't Plow Pox. Wouldn't it be VERY dangerous to the OR patient if someone in the board room had a cold and sneezed?
Benefit Room: So now the genius plan is to open the door really quickly and shove Kate out and then close the door really quick. Sonny cleverly draws what appears to be a black tunnel on the wall next to the door, so the toxin thinks THAT is the way out. Meep Meep! Wheels laughs that they are all going to die with the people they hate.
OR: oh, so in a remarkably stupid move, Patrick is taking the remaining spheres of Plow Pox out of Bragg. Aren't they pretty well contained in his body? It would only be a problem if he dropped one or cut into one, I would think. but then, I idiotically also adhere to the laws of physics, so what do I know?
Commercials
Haunted Starr: Ethan says he's never heard of Luke and asks if he's a local celebrity. Luke says he just owns a bar. Luke is getting loopy from all the stupid fancy drinks Ethan has made him, so he finally orders a scotch, neat. Ethan seems to know that the HS is only open sporadically. Luke says work should be fun, so he opens when he feels like it. Luke says Ethan can't be a card shark (or is it sharp?) and says only he fleeces his flock. Then he starts to get sleepy, while Ethan wipes down the bar.
Emma's Palace: Mac reasonably doesn't want his neice to go gallavanting about in a blizzard. Also, why would they not have canceled the benefit to avoid people DYING on the way there? Mac agrees, but he gets a call from the station.
GH Lobby: Patrick has met up with Sam and Spinelli and The Phone and tells Raynor he got the spheres out. I don't understand any of this? Why did he take the spheres out but have nowhere to put them? Raynor says the FBI will take over. Well, GET ON IT, Dude, geeze. Patrick says that Raynor better neutralize the toxin b/c it took out an entire OR in seconds.
Benefit: Trevor starts to lose his mind and screams at the doorway to be let out. Carly tells him to get a grip. Sonny yells at Claud for saying Kate was pretending to be sick. Claud laughs that she's a b.itch.
Jason calls Carly to say they are doing the best they can.
Wheels says the toxin is a paralytic, and he can tell you just how it will make you feel. Trevor stands by the door, gasping for breath. Claud watches with a smile on her face. Carly looks disgusted. Suddenly Trevor collapses and Carly calls for help.
GH Hall: Nik finds Jason and says Nadine is in the boardroom and wants to get her out. Jason explains that they already tried the old fake train track tunnel trick on the toxin, so there's no way to safely open the door again. Or, actually AT ALL, but whatever. or actually, it's just a door with a gap between the door and the frame, but what really matters is Nik panicks and tries to open the door, and Jaosn stops hiim and Nik sadly says he was chasing a dream earlier and left Nadine there. I keep wishing sharks would show up and eat everyone. That would be cool. They could be air born sharks.
GH Lobby: Sam yammers about something because while she was in law school she learned about disease containment, I guess? I don't know. This show is what would happen if Passions and a cruise ship on Days of Our Lives had a baby.
Commercials
Haunted Starr: Luke is drunk, or pretending to be and says he doesn't believvvvvvve in coincidences and that Ethan has never heard of him after being here for 48 hours. Luke has a point b/c being in Port Charles for 48 hours, I expect Ethan to know it's Emily's birthday. Luke warns Ethan not to get caught up in people's agendas. He yawns and says he has to learn how to see opportunities. LUke lays his head down on the table saying you have to answer when Opportunity knocks. Luke lays his head down with his hand clutching his gun though. Ethan says his sentiments exactly and smiles.
Emma's Palace: Mac has to leave b/c there is an incident, but Raynor wouldn't give him details, but there may be casualties. Robin and her Not Fooling Anyone pony tails prepars to hunker down for another night of ignoring her baby.
GH Hall: Jason wonders if Nik means Emily. Nik says he's not hallucinating, he saw a woman who looked like Emily. Jason says Nik has to get it together b/c it's all going to get a lot worse.
Benefit Room: So they open both doors for about 4 hours as Trevor gets sloooooowwwwwllllllllllyyyyyyy wheeled out, and then Ric holds the door open for another 3 hours watching him being wheeled away. They have put up a plastic curtain, l ike the kind that leads behind the deli counter in a supermarket, so obviously air born toxins can't get past that!
Then hilariously everyone starts having "private conversation" even though this room is smaller than any of their closets. Carly and Sonny, of course, find solace in each other's arms.
GH Lobby: Piph yells at Patrick and Sam about what is going on, and Sam says "I think we should close the OR" oh for fuck's sake. They haven't done that yet? lmao. Is some poor schmoe having his appendectomy in Plow Pox right now? Raynor calls, but somehow this time he calls on a GH line instead of The Phone. Patrick explains about how the OR team died, or is in ICU (thus infecting everyone that goes in or out of the ICU) and then Raynor demands that they quarantine the hospital. and by that, I can only assume he means TWO HOURS AGO when this became an issue, right? Like when he called Patrick to say "watch out for Bragg" he MUST have said, "and quarantine the hospital!" But then for some reason Patrick turns back to Jason, who raises his eyebrows, as if he was able to hear the quarantine order over the phone that he's not talking on. I hate everything about this episode.
Commercials
Haunted Starr: Ethan gently takes the gun from Luke and takes out the bullets. Of COURSE Ethan is the kind of doosh who wears his wallet on a bike chain. Ethan goes behind the bar and picks up the bricks of cash. But of course Luke was pretending to be passed out and has the gun again and tells Ethan they are back where they started.
GH: Patrick makes an announcement that the hospital is under quarantine. He blathers they are doing everything. Meanwhile, the Plow Pox spheres are sitting in a metal bowl, completely unguarded, in the OR. and some dude in a hazmat suit walks in and looks at them.
Benefit: For some bizarre reason, or....I guess I should say: Completely in keeping with the amount of realism on this show, Claud suddenly just HAS to tell Sonny who shot Kate. But she collapses just at that moment. Maybe there is no Plow Pox. Maybe it's just Sonny's toxic personality that is killing everyone?
GH: Random Dude tries to leave, but Piph tells him he can't. And then Jason and Sam stand at the doorway and stare out at the snow as Patrick says no one can leave. But until someone bothers to lock all the doors, I don't know how they plan to stop them? Unless it's by use of the moat, full of sharks, that has clearly sprung up overnight around the hospital.
The End
Thursday, January 29, 2009
GH Recap 1/29: We All Scream for Impeach Ice Cream...
OR: Again with the surgeons falling down, and Patrick screaming for them to leave. Liz gets thrown against the doors, but she slides down them. Oh, wait, no, this ain't Liz's first Sweeps, so she manages to get up again....aw, but then she falls again. heh. what was the point of that?
Credits.
Road: Jason drives the Mob Mobile (tm Spinelli) and tells Raynor by phone about how Bragg had an accident and Spinelli magically knew he was carrying poison, and Jason called Patrick, and Patrick started yelling it. He tells Raynor that Bragg is carrying the poison internally. Raynor reasonably doesn't like this news.
GH: Sam is there for no reason I can concieve of to hear Patrick tell her that Bragg is Plow Pox Ground Zero, and quarantine is next. Someone at abc.com called Sam "6 degrees of Sam McCall" and I wish I could remember who b/c it's hilarious and very accurate. Why is she ALWAYS there?
Emma's House: Robin is in a shiny, shiny red dress. Emma is sobbing through the monitor and Robin is trying to find someone from pediatrics to babysit. She can't get no satisfaction, so she throw the monitor at the red roses. Okay WE GET IT. blood red,,...everywhere. Robin picks up th emonitor and laments that now Emma's cries are only robotically muffled.
GH: Nik sees Chewbecca (tm Gracie from Soapnet) at the nurse's station. He tells someone he'll call them back, but then he stupidly runs away from the elevators, thinking he's following her. but if I have learned one thing in the past few days, it's if you want to find Chewbecca? Look no futher than the elevator bank!
Commercials
(I get the title really makes no sense b/c Blago was already impeached...but...well..."peach" is a flavor and "convict" is not...so...can ya just give me a little literary license? :D)
Roadside: Maxie has crashed into a snow bank. Aw, Maxie, welcome into the loving embrace of the Chicks Can NOT Drive sisterhood that this show loves to perpetuate. Random figure shows up and saves her.
Metrocourt: Wheels and Ric amusingly and hotly, accordingly, talk about how much Claud knows. She knows he's a Feets, and she thinks he shot Kate, and she has a crazy idea about The Farcockteh, or as I call the plan to make Jason whine, and Sonny kill him, and thus everyone else kill Jason.
Benefit: I would be so honored to have Edward flirt with me. Nik shows up, and Nadine asks where he was, but he acts way more defensive than her simple question warrants and sputters he was doing business. She manages to not ask what he's yammering about and says that it's not a big deal. Aw, it's so lame that Nadine is going to revert back to delightful just before they kill her. or make her leave town...whatever. I hate Emily is what I'm saying!
GH: Kate and Olivia meet. Olivia tries to stop Kate from provoking a fight with Carly or anyone tonight, of all nights. Olivia is right, but Kate now knows about Jerry Probst, so she's right too.
Phone Call GH to Cafe Interrogate: Patrick and Raynor talk about the Plow Pox and how it's air born and um....are you ...splutter. vomit. um. So, deep breath. So now Guza would have me know that a known air born pathogen was loose in the country, and their plan to solve it was to bribe a mobster? I've watched a lot of really stupid seasons of 24, but this? Is so much more stupider. and I'm including "Kim gets attacked by a cougar, but Kevin Dillon saves her" sooooo dumb.
commercials
Random Cabin! Hi Random Cabin! It was Johnny who saved Maxie! Hi, suck on this, looloo! Oh, my bad, it's a Random Radio Station? lool....no, sorry, it's a Random Mechanic's Shop. Maxie asks how he found her. He says she almost hit him.
Nurse's Station: Piph and Spin bicker. Piph says that Jason thinks and FBI guy will call her. Spin says they should evacuate,a nd she reasonably yells "into a blizzard?" and the she yells at him to leave.
GH Hall: Olivia and Kate bicker. Kate won't bother to tell Olivia what is really going on, which is her beeswax, but when Olivia reasonably says tonight is about a little boy and not Kate and Sonny. heh. But then Kate says that Olivia hates Sonny and asks like that is remotely the point. Then Kate does hilariously asks "why are you still in Port Charles?" heh. Love me some Olivia, but it's a great question. Kate decides to be a total b-word to her cousin, who stayed by her side while she recovered from a gun shot wound, and it's not acceptable to me. Kate learned something new, but she doesn't have the right to lambast Olivia like this. Olivia tearfully says she watched Sonny cold heartedly put 4 bullets into Krapov. She says he doesn't need protecting from Kate or anyone. Kate gets tearful and says she thinks she is the reason Olivia stayed. Olivia says Kate thinks she's the center of the universe. Kate clarifies that she means Dante and tells Olivia her secret is safe tonight....
suddenly Looloo clomps up and apologizes, and, folks, if looks could kill? Looloo would fit in the dust bin, with the looks of hate Olivia and Kate shoot her way. lol! That was very satisfying.
Benefit: Edward and Tracy grouse about how lil Michael has to live at Whole Foods now.
Meanwhile Claud and Sonny talk. Claud wants to reveal something about Wheels, but worries she coudl ruin her life.
Wheels rolls in at this point. Tracy and Edward give each other a look and go for a drink.
Nadine reminds me that she should end up in a volcano and starts yammering about stupid stuff. Nik finally has to shut her up. I assume chewbecca walks in at this point.
Emma's House: Robin cleans up the broken glass and tries to ignore Emma's cries. But then Emma stops crying. This makes Robin look up in concern, but then she goes back to cleaning. She tells the floor "you're okay. babies cry and fall asleep. mothers know that."
GH: Patrick has donned a Hax Mat suit and goes into the ER. Oh, good, I'm glad that he is safe, but alas, by opening the door, he released the air born toxins to...THE AIR.
and then in a giant bit of super stupidness, Liz gets put on a gurney, but then she gets wheeled by Jason and Sam....who are Haz Mat suitless....sooo.....um....they are both dead now too. Or, wait, maybe they used their righteous indignation to ward off the toxins! Yes, that makes sense.
Commercials
Abandoned Garage: Man, the economy is REALLY SUCKING now that people are not only abandoning fully stocked cabins, but also FULLY STOCKED auto garages. lol. hunker down, folks, even Port Charles is having a recession! Maxie and John bicker a bit, but then Maxie explains about Winnie the traitor and how she tattled on Spin, but Winspin are still friends. John accuses her of being jealous and fleeing. Maxie lets John know she knows that he lied to Loo about his nonjob.
GH; Variously equipped hazmat people try to save the OR people.
Benefit: Nadine asks who Chewbecca is. Nik asks if Nadine sees her too. Nadine says "you mean beret head? of course." Nik goes to talk to her. But then the creepiest weirdo thing happens, and it turns out that Chewbecca already has a ChewConnoh, b/c Nik accosts a woman who looks nothing like Emily. He apologizes.
Benefit: Carly challenges Wheels to write a big check. Heh, I've never thought about the Carly Factor when the truth of Michael's shooting comes out. God be with you, Wheels.
GH Hall: Olivia wipes way her stink eye and apologizes to Loo. Kate takes off.
GH: Always There Sam asks Jason how she can help. Jason gets a call from Raynor and briefs him. Again, they bring out totally infected people, this time Monica. Since Jason and Sam are already dead, I don't care, but Jason is visibly saddened to see his mother so sick. Aw, that's kind of sweet. Always There Sam takes the phone and for some reason Raynor knows that Everyone has to talk to Sam if Sam shows up, so he takes her briefing. Jason stares sadly at him mom.
Emma's: Robin has finally found a way to check on Emma. She sadly says Emma is so beautiful, and she doesn't deserve such a beautiful baby. Emma's eyes are open, but she's listless. Robin instinctively reaches out to touch her, but then she pulls back her hand and stares in alarm at her baby.
Commercials
yay, nathan Fillion has a new show!
Benefit: Is Claud a recovering alcoholic? because she never drinks. Wheels and Sonny bicker. He grotesquely offers up to the room what he thinks his daughter sex screams are like. Ric hilariously suggests some boundaries. WORD, RIC! love Wheels, but I need a Silkwood shower after that.
Carly keeps doing stuff but it's a busy show, so I really don't know what it is.
OR: a few Red Shirts are pronounced dead. Patrick drags Shawn D out of the or. FINALLY someone put up some srot of haz mat barrier, but doctors keep taking off their haz mat suits to treat the patients. Um, not that this will ever be a thing, but y'all DO know that "air born" means "if there is AIR, the toxin is BORN" RIGHT? Just consider it a Mad PSA....WEAR YOUR HAZ MAT suits when people have air born toxins on them!
Abandoned Garage: Maxie loves to talk about Luke and Laura's love story and how Looloo's brain is a mess b/c of it. But she's not being mean b/c she has the same issues. John says it sounds like Maxie has given it a lot of thought, and she snots that she doesn't lie awake thinking about it, but clearly she does b/c she has parents of the sort who rocketed a song up the pop charts in the real world after falling in love as well in this town.
Benefit: nik asks Loo to help him determine if he's crazy again by trying to figure out why he thought he saw Emily, when he really only saw Chewconnoh.
Man, a lot is going on today, folks.
GH: Jason and Spin try to figure out stuff. Patrick shows up to say something about there were Four something or others that have Plow Pox, but Bragg only lost One something or other. Jason asks about the other Four. (so I don't know if Patrick originally said 5, or if Jason is bad at math) I do know that Spinelli is now going to die b/c he's been around Jason and Sam who've been around the Plow Pox.
Commercials
Abandoned Garage: Johnny randomly finds some beer outside. So they drink it. I've never been that young. Maxie tells John that she can tell him her secrets b/c the other day Jason told spinelli...but then she stops herself. They stare at each other comically, and she says "see, you can trust me" heh. He says maybe not right now with the confiding, but they toast to each other.
GH: Loo is worried that Nik is seeing Tumorly again. He crazily says he saw her face as clear as he just saw Loo's, but he accosted the wrong woman. Loo says it was a case of mistaken identity. Loo decides that this is mostly about her and says she can't handle it if he's seeing dead people again. Oh, thanks, Loo, no, don't worry, nothing is wrong...as long as YOU are comfortable! Nik says it's nothing and hugs her.
Cafe Interrogate: Raynor yells at someone about the Plow Pox. Jason calls him and hands the phone to Raynor. Okay. so I was wrong, there were 5 Spheres, whatever those are, so there are 4 left. Spinelli interrupts to say that the duct from the OR leads to the board room. of COURSE it does. Why wouldn't people design multi story buildings with ducts that randomly lead to rooms on other floors? It's so cost effective and logical!
GH Hall: Kate finally finds Sonny, but she's having breathing problems and collapses.
So, not only is the Plow Pox boring to watch, it also takes a boringly stupid and illogical course through the human immune system
the end
Credits.
Road: Jason drives the Mob Mobile (tm Spinelli) and tells Raynor by phone about how Bragg had an accident and Spinelli magically knew he was carrying poison, and Jason called Patrick, and Patrick started yelling it. He tells Raynor that Bragg is carrying the poison internally. Raynor reasonably doesn't like this news.
GH: Sam is there for no reason I can concieve of to hear Patrick tell her that Bragg is Plow Pox Ground Zero, and quarantine is next. Someone at abc.com called Sam "6 degrees of Sam McCall" and I wish I could remember who b/c it's hilarious and very accurate. Why is she ALWAYS there?
Emma's House: Robin is in a shiny, shiny red dress. Emma is sobbing through the monitor and Robin is trying to find someone from pediatrics to babysit. She can't get no satisfaction, so she throw the monitor at the red roses. Okay WE GET IT. blood red,,...everywhere. Robin picks up th emonitor and laments that now Emma's cries are only robotically muffled.
GH: Nik sees Chewbecca (tm Gracie from Soapnet) at the nurse's station. He tells someone he'll call them back, but then he stupidly runs away from the elevators, thinking he's following her. but if I have learned one thing in the past few days, it's if you want to find Chewbecca? Look no futher than the elevator bank!
Commercials
(I get the title really makes no sense b/c Blago was already impeached...but...well..."peach" is a flavor and "convict" is not...so...can ya just give me a little literary license? :D)
Roadside: Maxie has crashed into a snow bank. Aw, Maxie, welcome into the loving embrace of the Chicks Can NOT Drive sisterhood that this show loves to perpetuate. Random figure shows up and saves her.
Metrocourt: Wheels and Ric amusingly and hotly, accordingly, talk about how much Claud knows. She knows he's a Feets, and she thinks he shot Kate, and she has a crazy idea about The Farcockteh, or as I call the plan to make Jason whine, and Sonny kill him, and thus everyone else kill Jason.
Benefit: I would be so honored to have Edward flirt with me. Nik shows up, and Nadine asks where he was, but he acts way more defensive than her simple question warrants and sputters he was doing business. She manages to not ask what he's yammering about and says that it's not a big deal. Aw, it's so lame that Nadine is going to revert back to delightful just before they kill her. or make her leave town...whatever. I hate Emily is what I'm saying!
GH: Kate and Olivia meet. Olivia tries to stop Kate from provoking a fight with Carly or anyone tonight, of all nights. Olivia is right, but Kate now knows about Jerry Probst, so she's right too.
Phone Call GH to Cafe Interrogate: Patrick and Raynor talk about the Plow Pox and how it's air born and um....are you ...splutter. vomit. um. So, deep breath. So now Guza would have me know that a known air born pathogen was loose in the country, and their plan to solve it was to bribe a mobster? I've watched a lot of really stupid seasons of 24, but this? Is so much more stupider. and I'm including "Kim gets attacked by a cougar, but Kevin Dillon saves her" sooooo dumb.
commercials
Random Cabin! Hi Random Cabin! It was Johnny who saved Maxie! Hi, suck on this, looloo! Oh, my bad, it's a Random Radio Station? lool....no, sorry, it's a Random Mechanic's Shop. Maxie asks how he found her. He says she almost hit him.
Nurse's Station: Piph and Spin bicker. Piph says that Jason thinks and FBI guy will call her. Spin says they should evacuate,a nd she reasonably yells "into a blizzard?" and the she yells at him to leave.
GH Hall: Olivia and Kate bicker. Kate won't bother to tell Olivia what is really going on, which is her beeswax, but when Olivia reasonably says tonight is about a little boy and not Kate and Sonny. heh. But then Kate says that Olivia hates Sonny and asks like that is remotely the point. Then Kate does hilariously asks "why are you still in Port Charles?" heh. Love me some Olivia, but it's a great question. Kate decides to be a total b-word to her cousin, who stayed by her side while she recovered from a gun shot wound, and it's not acceptable to me. Kate learned something new, but she doesn't have the right to lambast Olivia like this. Olivia tearfully says she watched Sonny cold heartedly put 4 bullets into Krapov. She says he doesn't need protecting from Kate or anyone. Kate gets tearful and says she thinks she is the reason Olivia stayed. Olivia says Kate thinks she's the center of the universe. Kate clarifies that she means Dante and tells Olivia her secret is safe tonight....
suddenly Looloo clomps up and apologizes, and, folks, if looks could kill? Looloo would fit in the dust bin, with the looks of hate Olivia and Kate shoot her way. lol! That was very satisfying.
Benefit: Edward and Tracy grouse about how lil Michael has to live at Whole Foods now.
Meanwhile Claud and Sonny talk. Claud wants to reveal something about Wheels, but worries she coudl ruin her life.
Wheels rolls in at this point. Tracy and Edward give each other a look and go for a drink.
Nadine reminds me that she should end up in a volcano and starts yammering about stupid stuff. Nik finally has to shut her up. I assume chewbecca walks in at this point.
Emma's House: Robin cleans up the broken glass and tries to ignore Emma's cries. But then Emma stops crying. This makes Robin look up in concern, but then she goes back to cleaning. She tells the floor "you're okay. babies cry and fall asleep. mothers know that."
GH: Patrick has donned a Hax Mat suit and goes into the ER. Oh, good, I'm glad that he is safe, but alas, by opening the door, he released the air born toxins to...THE AIR.
and then in a giant bit of super stupidness, Liz gets put on a gurney, but then she gets wheeled by Jason and Sam....who are Haz Mat suitless....sooo.....um....they are both dead now too. Or, wait, maybe they used their righteous indignation to ward off the toxins! Yes, that makes sense.
Commercials
Abandoned Garage: Man, the economy is REALLY SUCKING now that people are not only abandoning fully stocked cabins, but also FULLY STOCKED auto garages. lol. hunker down, folks, even Port Charles is having a recession! Maxie and John bicker a bit, but then Maxie explains about Winnie the traitor and how she tattled on Spin, but Winspin are still friends. John accuses her of being jealous and fleeing. Maxie lets John know she knows that he lied to Loo about his nonjob.
GH; Variously equipped hazmat people try to save the OR people.
Benefit: Nadine asks who Chewbecca is. Nik asks if Nadine sees her too. Nadine says "you mean beret head? of course." Nik goes to talk to her. But then the creepiest weirdo thing happens, and it turns out that Chewbecca already has a ChewConnoh, b/c Nik accosts a woman who looks nothing like Emily. He apologizes.
Benefit: Carly challenges Wheels to write a big check. Heh, I've never thought about the Carly Factor when the truth of Michael's shooting comes out. God be with you, Wheels.
GH Hall: Olivia wipes way her stink eye and apologizes to Loo. Kate takes off.
GH: Always There Sam asks Jason how she can help. Jason gets a call from Raynor and briefs him. Again, they bring out totally infected people, this time Monica. Since Jason and Sam are already dead, I don't care, but Jason is visibly saddened to see his mother so sick. Aw, that's kind of sweet. Always There Sam takes the phone and for some reason Raynor knows that Everyone has to talk to Sam if Sam shows up, so he takes her briefing. Jason stares sadly at him mom.
Emma's: Robin has finally found a way to check on Emma. She sadly says Emma is so beautiful, and she doesn't deserve such a beautiful baby. Emma's eyes are open, but she's listless. Robin instinctively reaches out to touch her, but then she pulls back her hand and stares in alarm at her baby.
Commercials
yay, nathan Fillion has a new show!
Benefit: Is Claud a recovering alcoholic? because she never drinks. Wheels and Sonny bicker. He grotesquely offers up to the room what he thinks his daughter sex screams are like. Ric hilariously suggests some boundaries. WORD, RIC! love Wheels, but I need a Silkwood shower after that.
Carly keeps doing stuff but it's a busy show, so I really don't know what it is.
OR: a few Red Shirts are pronounced dead. Patrick drags Shawn D out of the or. FINALLY someone put up some srot of haz mat barrier, but doctors keep taking off their haz mat suits to treat the patients. Um, not that this will ever be a thing, but y'all DO know that "air born" means "if there is AIR, the toxin is BORN" RIGHT? Just consider it a Mad PSA....WEAR YOUR HAZ MAT suits when people have air born toxins on them!
Abandoned Garage: Maxie loves to talk about Luke and Laura's love story and how Looloo's brain is a mess b/c of it. But she's not being mean b/c she has the same issues. John says it sounds like Maxie has given it a lot of thought, and she snots that she doesn't lie awake thinking about it, but clearly she does b/c she has parents of the sort who rocketed a song up the pop charts in the real world after falling in love as well in this town.
Benefit: nik asks Loo to help him determine if he's crazy again by trying to figure out why he thought he saw Emily, when he really only saw Chewconnoh.
Man, a lot is going on today, folks.
GH: Jason and Spin try to figure out stuff. Patrick shows up to say something about there were Four something or others that have Plow Pox, but Bragg only lost One something or other. Jason asks about the other Four. (so I don't know if Patrick originally said 5, or if Jason is bad at math) I do know that Spinelli is now going to die b/c he's been around Jason and Sam who've been around the Plow Pox.
Commercials
Abandoned Garage: Johnny randomly finds some beer outside. So they drink it. I've never been that young. Maxie tells John that she can tell him her secrets b/c the other day Jason told spinelli...but then she stops herself. They stare at each other comically, and she says "see, you can trust me" heh. He says maybe not right now with the confiding, but they toast to each other.
GH: Loo is worried that Nik is seeing Tumorly again. He crazily says he saw her face as clear as he just saw Loo's, but he accosted the wrong woman. Loo says it was a case of mistaken identity. Loo decides that this is mostly about her and says she can't handle it if he's seeing dead people again. Oh, thanks, Loo, no, don't worry, nothing is wrong...as long as YOU are comfortable! Nik says it's nothing and hugs her.
Cafe Interrogate: Raynor yells at someone about the Plow Pox. Jason calls him and hands the phone to Raynor. Okay. so I was wrong, there were 5 Spheres, whatever those are, so there are 4 left. Spinelli interrupts to say that the duct from the OR leads to the board room. of COURSE it does. Why wouldn't people design multi story buildings with ducts that randomly lead to rooms on other floors? It's so cost effective and logical!
GH Hall: Kate finally finds Sonny, but she's having breathing problems and collapses.
So, not only is the Plow Pox boring to watch, it also takes a boringly stupid and illogical course through the human immune system
the end
OLTL Recap 1/29: Look but Don't Touch
Courthouse: Nora sits in a red prison jumpsuit next to Tea and the judge sentences her to life for blowing another one of Todd's cases. Nora protests and a guard comes to take her, and then Tea and Todd sit at the judges bench and sip champagne. It is, of course a dream sequence, but it was a very, very good dream. Unless you are Nora, I guess.
Piney Cafe: Tea and Todd strategerize about what to do next to take over the world.
Exterior Set: Bo has a pizza and suggests Marty just stay home tonight, but Marty says she has to do something.
Hotel Room: Talia is guarding Lee in a hotel room, awaiting the trial. She assures Lee that Todd could never find this place. Talia, NEVER say never. Bo shows up with the pizza and asks Lee to come out of hiding. Lee cautiously stares at Marty.
St. Anne's: Jess tells Brody that she's leaving.
Credits
High school: Dillon gently distracts himself from Starr's sobbing hug. She apologizes for acting this way, and he says it's okay, but he needs to understand why she went to a teacher instead of a friend. Starr says she doesn't think Langston would understand how someone you love would try to hurt themselves, "like your mom, and my dad."
Piney Cafe: Tea has a flashdrive about Lee that says Lee has a long list of aliases. I wonder if she ever wore a hot pink wig when she was "undercover" like that dopey Syndey used to do. Cole shows up to mock them both for messing up his mom.
Hotel: Talia asks Bo to meet her outside and asks if it's kosher for Marty and Lee to meet. Bo lies that it is, but I can't fathom this is true.
Inside Marty immediately lays into Lee and says she's not here to dissuade her guilt The only way to do that is to bury Todd on the stand. Otherwise, Marty is going to bury her. pssst, Lee, Marty totally mind effed a man into killing himself a few weeks ago, so I highly recommend doing whatever she says!
Commercials
St. Anne's: Jess and Brody discuss her leaving. He wants to be as whole as possible before leaving, and he still clearly looks distressed by his conflicting memories of the boy in Iraq. She says she's worried b/c there are still pieces missing for her too.
Motel: Marty yells at Lee for never really taking care of her. Lee swears she really did care, even t hough she took money from Todd. Marty lambasts her and asks what Lee thought would happen, "I'd skip off to Neverland?" Her lips curl in tears and anger and she asks exactly how Lee expected it to end. Lee says even if she'd known Todd had raped her all those years ago, she still may not have been able to tell Marty because it was so clear they were in love now.
Piney Cafe: Tea cautions Cole that acting like this won't make his life better. He leans towards her and says "um, you are going to have to excuse me, I don't speak Bitch." omg. Todd says as any decent adult would that this is not acceptable. Cole just snears and asks if he offended the rapist. He leaves to score more pills.
Courtroom: Nora is not in orange anymore, and Bo shows up. He thinks she has a lot going on, what with raising their son who didn't get SORAS'd, thus she missed out on the 3 year boarding school break that most soap moms get. He asks how strong her case is, and she thinks it's workable.
High School: Starr says she treated Todd like he was dead to her, but she never dreamed he'd try to kill himself. Dillon interrupts and says it's not her fault. She says she saw him after he tried this, and she thinks he wants to make things right. She wonders if he deserves a 2nd chance...that maybe she shouldn't testify against him.
Commercials
St. Anne's: Brody tries to reassure Jess by saying they wouldn't send her home if she wasn't ready, and there are follow up visits. He quotes one of the nuns saying getting better is a lifelong process, and Jess jokes "she's a nun, everything for her is a lifelong process." and then they laugh, and it's lovely. He bids her a good night and leaves as Romantical Music swells sadly.
High School: Starr says that Todd loved her enough that he couldn't go through with kidnapping her baby, so how can she send him to prison. Geeze, Starr, someone needs to send her to a profoundly talented psychiatrist. Starr talks about her baby, and the time they were together when she was pregnant. She says she promised her baby that she'd never let Todd mess with her, and that testifying against Todd is Starr's way of saying her baby mattered. Wow, that's so sad. Dillon asks if anyone has said anything about his mother's involvement. She tells him Nora said it can't be brought up. He says knowing his mom didn't help Todd is like Starr knowing Todd didn't actually hurt the baby. She laments that she has to testify b/c people are counting on her, and her brothers love their dad. He says she has to stop beating herself up, so she can make the right choice.
Motel: Lee repeats that Marty was so in love with Todd. Marty disgustedly says "and what? Todd loved me back?" Lee sobs that Todd thought he did. Marty angrily says she trusted Lee and Todd with her life, and Lee stood by and watched while Todd violated her again. She she growls bitterly "again!" Lee sobs that she knows she's been wrong and has to live with that, and she's going to get on the stand and tell her story. She knows it won't make up for all she did to Marty, but she hopes it's a start. Marty growls that it better be enough to put Todd away for good. Then she rattles a chair, causing Lee to jump out of her skin, and leaves.
Piney Cafe: Douchehatted Drug Dealer only has a few pills. Cole wants DDD's connection, but obviously he doesn't give that info out.
High School: Dillon tells Starr he'll be in the court room tomorrow.
John's Bar: McHairdo greets Marty. She tells him she saw Lee and says she's not okay. He asks if she wants to talk, and she seems conflicted, but then Wes shows up and breaks the spell.
High School: Dillon reads a letter from his mother explaining that she entered into a shameful agreement to help Todd kidnap Starr's baby. She writes that it was wrong, and she wants Dillon toknow in case it ever came to light. She writes that Todd learned that Dillon had stolen drugs from the hospital and b/c Dillon had just gotten his life back on track, she agreed to Todd's blackmail. But then the baby died, and she couldn't live with that. Dillon and Violin Guy are very sad about this.
Courtroom: Bo cautions Nora to get a nap b/c she will need it. Bo leaves, and Nora rehearses her statements to the jury. She has a picture of the Family Manning and how happy they look, but a year made a big difference (meanwhile, Starr tears this same picture down off her locker) Nora talks about how Todd planned to get revenge against everyone who hurt him (we see John starely maudlinly at his bar) Nora continues that TOdd planned to make a new family, and also wreak havoc on two teenagers (we see Cole downing pills) He says he planned on kidnapping their baby, and one woman won't be here b/c she commited suicide (Dillon reads his mother's letter) but the other woman will be here (Talia goes back into Lee's motel room) Nora continues that his daughter will tell the jury what he was planning (Blair finds Starr at school and holds her) as Nora finishes "because Todd confessed it all to her"
Suddenly it is the day of the court proceedings, and Nora has just finished actually saying all of that to the jury. She shows the jury a photo of the baby we all call Chloe and that the baby died b/c Dr. Joplin was too busy dealing with Todd to notice a small medical problem that would not have been fatal if treated. Todd is lucky Nancy Grace doesn't know about this case!
The judge asks if the defense is ready, and Tea, dressed in black with a flouncy white collar purrs that she is. Look out, jury! When Tea purrs, it will lull you into doing her bidding! Vaya con Dios, y'all!
Commercials
Courtroom: Tea begins her opening remarks. She says Todd's history is in the past and over. He's not the man the DA's office has claimed he is. He's incapable of those crimes. She calls the charges flimsy and that they are trumped up to exact revenge and that Nora is the opposite of Perry Mason in Todd's regard. (I paraphrase) Tea says she will show the witness's testimony are lies. (is lies?)
Motel: Why would Lee still be in her motel room? Guard Guy brings her lunch and the paper, but for some reason Guard Guy didn't bother to notice that the headline is a LAMBASTING of Lee, calling her Lee KaChing Halpern. I love The Sun. I wish I had one in my town.
Courtroom: Tea basically repeats that this case is a personal vendetta on Nora's part. Judge calls recess. Tea whispers to Todd that the case is about managed expectations, and he smirks "as long as you don't manage my kid away"
Wes tells Marty he has to go, and Marty accurse John of doing that. heh. Dillon winks at Starr that it's going to be okay. Nora angrily tosses The Sun at Tea. She tells the judge that this was a blatant attempt to use the tabloid against a witness, and she whines a bit about it. It was a dirty trick...But SERIOUSLY Nora, how have you not ALREADY had an injunction to stop Todd and The Sun from doing this very thing? Worse lawyer ever.
Commercials
Courthouse: Judge tells Nora to blow it out her ear. Nora asks for the jury to be sequestered, and he agrees. She calls Antonio to the stand.
Motel: Talia tries to calm Lee, but she explains that she's swindled a lot of people, and now they might all come after her. Well, maybe don't be a dirt bag swindler in the next life, Red Shirt!
Courtroom: Antonio and Nora have a scene which is basically like serving me brussel sprouts and monkey brain for dinner, so I'm going to assume that Antonio tries to be helpful, and Nora is smug. Something about Antonio seeing baby stuff in Todd's home.
Tea gets back to purring, so I can pay attention again. She, of course, rips a giant hole in Antonio's smug testimony. She has a tax return or something that shows Todd was going to give a truckload of stuff to orphans. Antonio smugly asks when Todd signed this, and Tea indulges him by saying it doesn't matter to the orphans. I need an Evil Tea in my life to get in people's faces like that.
St. Anne's: Jess and Brody continue their flirty (in a healthy way) goodbye. She tells him to call him when he's out, so they can breath non crazy air together. He says he looks forward to it. Me too!
Courtroom: Nora calls Starr to the stand.
Commercials
Switchback between Courtroom and Motel Room:
Lee and Starr are both having second thoughts....because the Awesome Evil that is Tea's Jedi Mind Tricks is pervading the air.
Nora gently prods Starr to testify like they planned, but Starr is clearly having a struggle with this.
Meanwhile, Talia tries to assure Lee that she's under police protection, and she just has to be cool like Fonzie and patient. But Lee smashes Talia over the head and says she can't take that chance.
Other meanwhile: Nora is doing an admirable job of stalling to figure out what is up with Starr's obvious change of heart without getting Tea's ire up and objecting. She dances around a bit but finally asks bluntly if Todd ever said he planned to kidnap her baby. But Nora must have known the show is almost over...because it is...so now we have to wait. (for the obvious conclusion that Todd gets away with this too)
the end.
Piney Cafe: Tea and Todd strategerize about what to do next to take over the world.
Exterior Set: Bo has a pizza and suggests Marty just stay home tonight, but Marty says she has to do something.
Hotel Room: Talia is guarding Lee in a hotel room, awaiting the trial. She assures Lee that Todd could never find this place. Talia, NEVER say never. Bo shows up with the pizza and asks Lee to come out of hiding. Lee cautiously stares at Marty.
St. Anne's: Jess tells Brody that she's leaving.
Credits
High school: Dillon gently distracts himself from Starr's sobbing hug. She apologizes for acting this way, and he says it's okay, but he needs to understand why she went to a teacher instead of a friend. Starr says she doesn't think Langston would understand how someone you love would try to hurt themselves, "like your mom, and my dad."
Piney Cafe: Tea has a flashdrive about Lee that says Lee has a long list of aliases. I wonder if she ever wore a hot pink wig when she was "undercover" like that dopey Syndey used to do. Cole shows up to mock them both for messing up his mom.
Hotel: Talia asks Bo to meet her outside and asks if it's kosher for Marty and Lee to meet. Bo lies that it is, but I can't fathom this is true.
Inside Marty immediately lays into Lee and says she's not here to dissuade her guilt The only way to do that is to bury Todd on the stand. Otherwise, Marty is going to bury her. pssst, Lee, Marty totally mind effed a man into killing himself a few weeks ago, so I highly recommend doing whatever she says!
Commercials
St. Anne's: Jess and Brody discuss her leaving. He wants to be as whole as possible before leaving, and he still clearly looks distressed by his conflicting memories of the boy in Iraq. She says she's worried b/c there are still pieces missing for her too.
Motel: Marty yells at Lee for never really taking care of her. Lee swears she really did care, even t hough she took money from Todd. Marty lambasts her and asks what Lee thought would happen, "I'd skip off to Neverland?" Her lips curl in tears and anger and she asks exactly how Lee expected it to end. Lee says even if she'd known Todd had raped her all those years ago, she still may not have been able to tell Marty because it was so clear they were in love now.
Piney Cafe: Tea cautions Cole that acting like this won't make his life better. He leans towards her and says "um, you are going to have to excuse me, I don't speak Bitch." omg. Todd says as any decent adult would that this is not acceptable. Cole just snears and asks if he offended the rapist. He leaves to score more pills.
Courtroom: Nora is not in orange anymore, and Bo shows up. He thinks she has a lot going on, what with raising their son who didn't get SORAS'd, thus she missed out on the 3 year boarding school break that most soap moms get. He asks how strong her case is, and she thinks it's workable.
High School: Starr says she treated Todd like he was dead to her, but she never dreamed he'd try to kill himself. Dillon interrupts and says it's not her fault. She says she saw him after he tried this, and she thinks he wants to make things right. She wonders if he deserves a 2nd chance...that maybe she shouldn't testify against him.
Commercials
St. Anne's: Brody tries to reassure Jess by saying they wouldn't send her home if she wasn't ready, and there are follow up visits. He quotes one of the nuns saying getting better is a lifelong process, and Jess jokes "she's a nun, everything for her is a lifelong process." and then they laugh, and it's lovely. He bids her a good night and leaves as Romantical Music swells sadly.
High School: Starr says that Todd loved her enough that he couldn't go through with kidnapping her baby, so how can she send him to prison. Geeze, Starr, someone needs to send her to a profoundly talented psychiatrist. Starr talks about her baby, and the time they were together when she was pregnant. She says she promised her baby that she'd never let Todd mess with her, and that testifying against Todd is Starr's way of saying her baby mattered. Wow, that's so sad. Dillon asks if anyone has said anything about his mother's involvement. She tells him Nora said it can't be brought up. He says knowing his mom didn't help Todd is like Starr knowing Todd didn't actually hurt the baby. She laments that she has to testify b/c people are counting on her, and her brothers love their dad. He says she has to stop beating herself up, so she can make the right choice.
Motel: Lee repeats that Marty was so in love with Todd. Marty disgustedly says "and what? Todd loved me back?" Lee sobs that Todd thought he did. Marty angrily says she trusted Lee and Todd with her life, and Lee stood by and watched while Todd violated her again. She she growls bitterly "again!" Lee sobs that she knows she's been wrong and has to live with that, and she's going to get on the stand and tell her story. She knows it won't make up for all she did to Marty, but she hopes it's a start. Marty growls that it better be enough to put Todd away for good. Then she rattles a chair, causing Lee to jump out of her skin, and leaves.
Piney Cafe: Douchehatted Drug Dealer only has a few pills. Cole wants DDD's connection, but obviously he doesn't give that info out.
High School: Dillon tells Starr he'll be in the court room tomorrow.
John's Bar: McHairdo greets Marty. She tells him she saw Lee and says she's not okay. He asks if she wants to talk, and she seems conflicted, but then Wes shows up and breaks the spell.
High School: Dillon reads a letter from his mother explaining that she entered into a shameful agreement to help Todd kidnap Starr's baby. She writes that it was wrong, and she wants Dillon toknow in case it ever came to light. She writes that Todd learned that Dillon had stolen drugs from the hospital and b/c Dillon had just gotten his life back on track, she agreed to Todd's blackmail. But then the baby died, and she couldn't live with that. Dillon and Violin Guy are very sad about this.
Courtroom: Bo cautions Nora to get a nap b/c she will need it. Bo leaves, and Nora rehearses her statements to the jury. She has a picture of the Family Manning and how happy they look, but a year made a big difference (meanwhile, Starr tears this same picture down off her locker) Nora talks about how Todd planned to get revenge against everyone who hurt him (we see John starely maudlinly at his bar) Nora continues that TOdd planned to make a new family, and also wreak havoc on two teenagers (we see Cole downing pills) He says he planned on kidnapping their baby, and one woman won't be here b/c she commited suicide (Dillon reads his mother's letter) but the other woman will be here (Talia goes back into Lee's motel room) Nora continues that his daughter will tell the jury what he was planning (Blair finds Starr at school and holds her) as Nora finishes "because Todd confessed it all to her"
Suddenly it is the day of the court proceedings, and Nora has just finished actually saying all of that to the jury. She shows the jury a photo of the baby we all call Chloe and that the baby died b/c Dr. Joplin was too busy dealing with Todd to notice a small medical problem that would not have been fatal if treated. Todd is lucky Nancy Grace doesn't know about this case!
The judge asks if the defense is ready, and Tea, dressed in black with a flouncy white collar purrs that she is. Look out, jury! When Tea purrs, it will lull you into doing her bidding! Vaya con Dios, y'all!
Commercials
Courtroom: Tea begins her opening remarks. She says Todd's history is in the past and over. He's not the man the DA's office has claimed he is. He's incapable of those crimes. She calls the charges flimsy and that they are trumped up to exact revenge and that Nora is the opposite of Perry Mason in Todd's regard. (I paraphrase) Tea says she will show the witness's testimony are lies. (is lies?)
Motel: Why would Lee still be in her motel room? Guard Guy brings her lunch and the paper, but for some reason Guard Guy didn't bother to notice that the headline is a LAMBASTING of Lee, calling her Lee KaChing Halpern. I love The Sun. I wish I had one in my town.
Courtroom: Tea basically repeats that this case is a personal vendetta on Nora's part. Judge calls recess. Tea whispers to Todd that the case is about managed expectations, and he smirks "as long as you don't manage my kid away"
Wes tells Marty he has to go, and Marty accurse John of doing that. heh. Dillon winks at Starr that it's going to be okay. Nora angrily tosses The Sun at Tea. She tells the judge that this was a blatant attempt to use the tabloid against a witness, and she whines a bit about it. It was a dirty trick...But SERIOUSLY Nora, how have you not ALREADY had an injunction to stop Todd and The Sun from doing this very thing? Worse lawyer ever.
Commercials
Courthouse: Judge tells Nora to blow it out her ear. Nora asks for the jury to be sequestered, and he agrees. She calls Antonio to the stand.
Motel: Talia tries to calm Lee, but she explains that she's swindled a lot of people, and now they might all come after her. Well, maybe don't be a dirt bag swindler in the next life, Red Shirt!
Courtroom: Antonio and Nora have a scene which is basically like serving me brussel sprouts and monkey brain for dinner, so I'm going to assume that Antonio tries to be helpful, and Nora is smug. Something about Antonio seeing baby stuff in Todd's home.
Tea gets back to purring, so I can pay attention again. She, of course, rips a giant hole in Antonio's smug testimony. She has a tax return or something that shows Todd was going to give a truckload of stuff to orphans. Antonio smugly asks when Todd signed this, and Tea indulges him by saying it doesn't matter to the orphans. I need an Evil Tea in my life to get in people's faces like that.
St. Anne's: Jess and Brody continue their flirty (in a healthy way) goodbye. She tells him to call him when he's out, so they can breath non crazy air together. He says he looks forward to it. Me too!
Courtroom: Nora calls Starr to the stand.
Commercials
Switchback between Courtroom and Motel Room:
Lee and Starr are both having second thoughts....because the Awesome Evil that is Tea's Jedi Mind Tricks is pervading the air.
Nora gently prods Starr to testify like they planned, but Starr is clearly having a struggle with this.
Meanwhile, Talia tries to assure Lee that she's under police protection, and she just has to be cool like Fonzie and patient. But Lee smashes Talia over the head and says she can't take that chance.
Other meanwhile: Nora is doing an admirable job of stalling to figure out what is up with Starr's obvious change of heart without getting Tea's ire up and objecting. She dances around a bit but finally asks bluntly if Todd ever said he planned to kidnap her baby. But Nora must have known the show is almost over...because it is...so now we have to wait. (for the obvious conclusion that Todd gets away with this too)
the end.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
GH Recap 1/28: A Plow Pox on Both Yer Houses
Dark and Stormy Cafe Interrogate: Patrick continues not to say much of anything helpful about the impending Plow Pox. He says they didn't know how bad it was about to get. He couldn't stop thinking about Liz and her two little boys, and he should have been thinking about Robin and Emma. Well, maybe, Patrick. But Liz is totally sweet and pretty and unpacks a house in under 4 hours! Robin is grumpy about chocolate.
Sepia Tone Winnie gets all grumpy with Phone Guy as she tells Phone Guy that Spinellii also died along with Looloo, Carly, Sonny and whoever else she mentions at the beginning of each show. She says Phone Guy should make a list of heroes and put Spinelli at the top of the list.
Back to Color:
Jason's Penthouse: Jason calmly talks to someone about The Truck. I guess he thinks he found the person who bought The Cargo? Spinelli listens.
Credits
Q Crypt: Nik has made it to the crypt and leaves some roses by the door and says happy birthday to Emily and says he misses her. He scoffs that this is probably a shock to her. Um, no, Nik, she's not doing much of anything but rotting right about now. He stands there in the shivery, shivery cold on a night that's been described as a sweeps worthy snow storm and chats about board meetings and being reminded of her birthday. He sadly says they shared a home, and it hits him everyday he wakes up. The gargoyle in the bedroom that she teased him about all the time. He repeats that he misses her and fights back tears when he tells her he met someone funny, light and pure. For some reason he leaves out super annoying, which is odd, b/c knowing that might make Emily feel better. Nik sadly says "but she's not you" Aw, that is so Ross and Rachel of him to say.
Metrocourt: Looloo rushes in and says she has to talk to Carly, or she's cutting off all her hair and swearing off relationships forever. Fine by me! Carly annoyingly thinks this is a bad plan. Loo complains about Johnny for being exactly the same man he's been since the day she met him. She says he likes scaring people, but he gave up his money, so he's not scary. She asks Carly to guess what he's done now, and Carly says he's blaming it on Looloo. But then the Metrocourt caves in on them! yay! Oh, whoops, just my imagination.
Corinthaus: Because phones have not been invented, Kate walks over in the bone chilling snow storm to talk about donations to the Benefit. She doesn't know if she should go. She gets a bit weepy and says the night Michael was shot still haunts her. She says they never really came back from that moment, everythign was just a reaction to it. Sonny angrily says that whoever shot Michael cost him everything. He's wondered if someone else was involved besides Devlin. Claud eaveslurks from the top of the stairs as Sonny says that he'll deal with this piece of scum. Kate sadly asks what that will accomplish. Claud lets her presence be known.
GH; Shawn Douglas tells Patrick that he's distracted,and should go home to his wife and baby, what with the impending blizzard that everyone keeps going all over town in. Suddenly the patient starts having a seizure, or something, so the Brothers Drake jump into action.
Jason's Penthouse: Jason continues talking to phone guy about the suspect, which is basically the description of every single white guy I know. Jason just wants to give the info to Raynor and be done with it, but Spinelli says that there is a biotoxin on the loose, and doesn't that warrant further investigation. Yes, Spinny, it does, and the federal government has way more funding than you and Jason do.
GH: Sam is there for a bump on the head, and she and Liz chat politely:
Plow Pox Guy: He is very wobbly and says something about his symptoms. Shawn D assures him he'll be fine. Way to kill everyone by jinxing the town, Shawn!
Commercials
Corinthaus: Claud glares at Kate. Sonny tells her that for whatever reason she came, it was good to see her. Kate says it won't happen again and leaves, but first says that making anyone pay won't change anything. Sonny says it will b/c he will finally have justice. Yeah, Sonny, that's what she just said: that won't change anything. You'll still be creepy and miserable. Kate leaves to walk across the acres in a blizzard.
Metrocourt: Looloo continues not to work but does continue to complain about her boyfriend. Apparently someone told her that it's only puppies and gumdrops to have a relationship with a brooding, violent loser with no prospects.
Jason's Penthouse: Raynor has driven to Jason's IN A BLIZZARD because phones don't exist to hear that a white male, 170 pounds is a suspect. Raynor is understandably angry that this is all Jason has learned. Jason yells that if he does anything else, he may as well paint a target on his back.
GH: Patrick asks Liz to scrub in for Plow Pox surgery. He examines Sam. I guess b/c she hit her head? Seems sort of like a waste of time to have a neurosurgeon examine a boo boo, but it gives Patrick a chance to be worried about his wife to the only person left in town he hasn't said anything to yet. Why would Sam even ask about Robin? don't they barely know each other? Doesn't she barely know Patrick for that matter? Or is she just practicing private eye skills?
Commercials
Corinthaus: Claud once again has been caught snooping, so Sonny asks her about it. She tries to be light and jokey and says she was bored, so she went to the PCPD to sign up to be a spy. heh. He says the blizzard is starting, so they should go to the Benefit.
Kate's Beige House: Kate watches Jerry Probst talk to Claud about her role in Michael's shooting.
GH: Patrick says it's taking Robin awhile to recover from her c-section and asks Sam about it. Sam gently says she was too busy mourning that her baby died to remember if the pain from surgery recovery took a long time. Patrick apologizes for bringing it up, a nd Sam says he's clearly worried about Robin, so it's fine.
Jason's Penthouse: Raynor and Jason fight. Raynor demands that Jason get him a name for the hijacking or Spinelli will go to prison forever. Jason gives him a name of a Satan's Rider who blah blah omg this is so stupid. Raynor says that Jason still has to give info in Wheels, and keep the violence to a minimum. Jason made the crappiest deal ever for having to solve this hijacking and deal with the Z's, and all he gets is Spinelli? Lame. He should have asked for some pizza coupons. Or had Raynor buy some of his juice! Spinelli wants to do something stupid and dangerous.
Commercials
Jason's Penthouse: Spinelli's plan is that the more intel Jason gives the feds, the more grateful they will be, so he wants to try to do their own research on the Plow Pox. Jason agrees to say there is a buyer for the poison, but he can't fly out b/c of the weather, so Spinelli decides he must have rented a car, and he's going to cross reference all the cars rented with driver's license photos.
Nik's Memory: Aw, Nik has a memory from back when he had a neck. That was such a better look for him. He remembers realizing he'd finally found love with Emily. (Gia's memory is all "hey!") Nadine shows up to knock Nik out of his memory, and he uneasily hugs her.
Kate's Beige House: Jerry Probst basically draws a map and provides pie charts and videotape of Claud shooting Michael. What's the point of stashing puzzle pieces all over the place if all the puzzle pieces ALSO contain the info that the big final piece supposedly contains? If anyone can stumble upon ANY of the dvd's and learn everythign, then ...uh....why hide more of the same? I hate Jerry Probst. Kate seems to still not know what all of this means.
Metrocourt: Edward awesomely tells Carly that it's too bad she didn't grow a conscience in time to help Michael. OH, burn, old man! Carly is very wounded. (but not as wounded as her son, so Shut Up, Carly's indignance)
GH: Sam tries to counsel Patrick. She says that Jason was there for her at the very worst time in her life, and knowing she had someone who loved her...if Patrick can do that for Robin, that's all she'll need. Patrick thanks her.
OR: Monica and Shawn D debate about starting surgery. Monica says she'll assist b/c he'll need another set of hands. Patrick shows up to take over, but Shawn D tells him to quit trying to steal his glory and to go home to his family. Patrick says the patient is all him.
Commercials
Metrocourt: As per usual when there's a crisis, Jax is leaving town. He has to go to Hong Kong. In a blizzard! He asks Olivia to explain all this to Carly. (because phones don't exist)
Kate finds loo and says she can have her job back if she'll go the Benefit and stand guard while Kate talks to Sonny.
GH: Edward asks if Michael has improved. Is this Benefit taking place in a stuffy GH meeting room? How lame. Nik finds Claud and reminds us all that he knows Claud was involved with Michael's shooting. He agrees to keep her secret but says remembering how vibrant Michael used to be makes it difficult. Edward flirts with Nadine. He loves willowy blonds, that one. Sonny and Carly maudlinly greet each other.
Jason's Penthouse: Spinelli has narrowed down a few people and says he'll see if they have criminal records. Jason doesn't want him to hack into a govt database. Spinelli learns that Earl Bragg, one of the suspects, had a car accident and is at GH.
GH: Patrick checks Bragg's x-rays. Piph gets a call that just happens to be about Bragg. Patrick grabs the phone and asks why the caller is calling about Bragg. Then he says "poison?" and then he either says "yeah, I know WHERE it is" or "Yeah, I know WHAT it is"
commercials
We've finally gotten the point of the show whereby Patrick warns Piph to call the OR and tell them not to operate.
Patrick frantically tells Piph to call the OR and tell Shawn D not to operate on that patient under any circumstances, then he sprints towards the elevators holding a file. We hear a ticking clock as Piph immediately picks up the phone and dials.
In the OR Monica announces the patient is minutes away from going into V tach and asks if the lab readings on the patient's blood are here yet. She's told they are on their way.
Patrick sprints to the elevator and hits the button. In the OR Shawn D asks if they are good and Liz tells him they are. Patrick stares up at the clock, which reads 7:00pm and then turns and sprints to the stairwell. (hopefully he doesn't end up in New Orleans!) Shawn D calls for a scalpel as Piph hangs up and tries to call the OR again. Shawn D makes the first incision, and we fade to Robin at home. She runs her hands through her hair in frustration as Emma cries from another room. Patrick continues running up the stairs at GH. Spinelli, at Jason's penthouse, hangs up his phone and starts to move for the door. In the OR, Monica and Shawn D continue as we see Patrick running.
Nurse's station, Nik is on the phone and glances over and sees a woman in a beret who looks like Emily. He does a double take. More shots from the OR and Patrick running. Monica asks Layla if the patient has at least a liter in, and she says she'll check. Someone runs up some steps in the snow, maybe Spinelli. Shawn D asks a nurse to really follow the suction. Kate walks down a hall and into Carly's line of sight, causing Carly's face to fall as she talks to Sonny. She leaves. Looloo takes off an earring and throws it down in what appears to be anger and storms off. Johnny lays what appears to be an unconscious Maxie down on the ground. Spinelli grabs his coat and rushes out the door. We hear Emma crying through the monitor again, and Robin slowly approaches the baby monitor and throws it across the room, knocking over a vase of red roses.
Patrick continues running up the stairs and is on the 10th floor. Jason drives erratically, and we hear his tires screech. Layla tells Monica the patient's blood is here, so she tells Layla to pour it in b/c he's going to need every drop. Kate approaches Sonny from behind, looking ominous and troubled. We see a red-nailed hand holding one of jerry's dvd's. Claud approaches Sonny and gingerly touches his arm.
Patrick has to fiercely open the 10th floor stairwell door. Shawn D says he thinks he's found the problem and says he's going in and asks for a scalpel. Patrick rushes across the 10th floor and runs into a nurse, knocking over her supply cart. He keeps rushing. Shawn d calls for head's up b/c they have a bleeder, and he asks for suction.
Nik stands and stares at the woman who looks like Emily. Shawn D says there is so much blood, he can't see anything.
Carly eyes Sonny wearily. Kate walks down a hall and holds her stomach, taking a deep breath. Shawn D continues to instruct the nurse doing the suction. He thinks he's found the bleeder, but then says something is wrong. They are all silent for a beat and then blood spurts onto his mask and face. Everyone gasps in the OR. Patrick makes it to the OR door and yells for them to stop. He stands at the window and yells at Shawn D to stop and get out of the room. Monica's gloves are bloody, and she looks faint as she adjusts her surgical mask and sinks to the ground in slow motion. We see a close up of Patrick's face, frantically watching the scene and yelling for everyone to stop. Liz slowly turns and also looks faint and begins to sink to the ground. What appears to be flames show up at the bottom of the screen, but I think that's just effect? We vaguely see the forms of the surgeons and nurse's falling to the ground, and someone appears to try to open the door. There is also the face of a man gasping for breathPatrick pounds on the glass and bellows "nooooo!"
Sepia Tone Winnie gets all grumpy with Phone Guy as she tells Phone Guy that Spinellii also died along with Looloo, Carly, Sonny and whoever else she mentions at the beginning of each show. She says Phone Guy should make a list of heroes and put Spinelli at the top of the list.
Back to Color:
Jason's Penthouse: Jason calmly talks to someone about The Truck. I guess he thinks he found the person who bought The Cargo? Spinelli listens.
Credits
Q Crypt: Nik has made it to the crypt and leaves some roses by the door and says happy birthday to Emily and says he misses her. He scoffs that this is probably a shock to her. Um, no, Nik, she's not doing much of anything but rotting right about now. He stands there in the shivery, shivery cold on a night that's been described as a sweeps worthy snow storm and chats about board meetings and being reminded of her birthday. He sadly says they shared a home, and it hits him everyday he wakes up. The gargoyle in the bedroom that she teased him about all the time. He repeats that he misses her and fights back tears when he tells her he met someone funny, light and pure. For some reason he leaves out super annoying, which is odd, b/c knowing that might make Emily feel better. Nik sadly says "but she's not you" Aw, that is so Ross and Rachel of him to say.
Metrocourt: Looloo rushes in and says she has to talk to Carly, or she's cutting off all her hair and swearing off relationships forever. Fine by me! Carly annoyingly thinks this is a bad plan. Loo complains about Johnny for being exactly the same man he's been since the day she met him. She says he likes scaring people, but he gave up his money, so he's not scary. She asks Carly to guess what he's done now, and Carly says he's blaming it on Looloo. But then the Metrocourt caves in on them! yay! Oh, whoops, just my imagination.
Corinthaus: Because phones have not been invented, Kate walks over in the bone chilling snow storm to talk about donations to the Benefit. She doesn't know if she should go. She gets a bit weepy and says the night Michael was shot still haunts her. She says they never really came back from that moment, everythign was just a reaction to it. Sonny angrily says that whoever shot Michael cost him everything. He's wondered if someone else was involved besides Devlin. Claud eaveslurks from the top of the stairs as Sonny says that he'll deal with this piece of scum. Kate sadly asks what that will accomplish. Claud lets her presence be known.
GH; Shawn Douglas tells Patrick that he's distracted,and should go home to his wife and baby, what with the impending blizzard that everyone keeps going all over town in. Suddenly the patient starts having a seizure, or something, so the Brothers Drake jump into action.
Jason's Penthouse: Jason continues talking to phone guy about the suspect, which is basically the description of every single white guy I know. Jason just wants to give the info to Raynor and be done with it, but Spinelli says that there is a biotoxin on the loose, and doesn't that warrant further investigation. Yes, Spinny, it does, and the federal government has way more funding than you and Jason do.
GH: Sam is there for a bump on the head, and she and Liz chat politely:
Plow Pox Guy: He is very wobbly and says something about his symptoms. Shawn D assures him he'll be fine. Way to kill everyone by jinxing the town, Shawn!
Commercials
Corinthaus: Claud glares at Kate. Sonny tells her that for whatever reason she came, it was good to see her. Kate says it won't happen again and leaves, but first says that making anyone pay won't change anything. Sonny says it will b/c he will finally have justice. Yeah, Sonny, that's what she just said: that won't change anything. You'll still be creepy and miserable. Kate leaves to walk across the acres in a blizzard.
Metrocourt: Looloo continues not to work but does continue to complain about her boyfriend. Apparently someone told her that it's only puppies and gumdrops to have a relationship with a brooding, violent loser with no prospects.
Jason's Penthouse: Raynor has driven to Jason's IN A BLIZZARD because phones don't exist to hear that a white male, 170 pounds is a suspect. Raynor is understandably angry that this is all Jason has learned. Jason yells that if he does anything else, he may as well paint a target on his back.
GH: Patrick asks Liz to scrub in for Plow Pox surgery. He examines Sam. I guess b/c she hit her head? Seems sort of like a waste of time to have a neurosurgeon examine a boo boo, but it gives Patrick a chance to be worried about his wife to the only person left in town he hasn't said anything to yet. Why would Sam even ask about Robin? don't they barely know each other? Doesn't she barely know Patrick for that matter? Or is she just practicing private eye skills?
Commercials
Corinthaus: Claud once again has been caught snooping, so Sonny asks her about it. She tries to be light and jokey and says she was bored, so she went to the PCPD to sign up to be a spy. heh. He says the blizzard is starting, so they should go to the Benefit.
Kate's Beige House: Kate watches Jerry Probst talk to Claud about her role in Michael's shooting.
GH: Patrick says it's taking Robin awhile to recover from her c-section and asks Sam about it. Sam gently says she was too busy mourning that her baby died to remember if the pain from surgery recovery took a long time. Patrick apologizes for bringing it up, a nd Sam says he's clearly worried about Robin, so it's fine.
Jason's Penthouse: Raynor and Jason fight. Raynor demands that Jason get him a name for the hijacking or Spinelli will go to prison forever. Jason gives him a name of a Satan's Rider who blah blah omg this is so stupid. Raynor says that Jason still has to give info in Wheels, and keep the violence to a minimum. Jason made the crappiest deal ever for having to solve this hijacking and deal with the Z's, and all he gets is Spinelli? Lame. He should have asked for some pizza coupons. Or had Raynor buy some of his juice! Spinelli wants to do something stupid and dangerous.
Commercials
Jason's Penthouse: Spinelli's plan is that the more intel Jason gives the feds, the more grateful they will be, so he wants to try to do their own research on the Plow Pox. Jason agrees to say there is a buyer for the poison, but he can't fly out b/c of the weather, so Spinelli decides he must have rented a car, and he's going to cross reference all the cars rented with driver's license photos.
Nik's Memory: Aw, Nik has a memory from back when he had a neck. That was such a better look for him. He remembers realizing he'd finally found love with Emily. (Gia's memory is all "hey!") Nadine shows up to knock Nik out of his memory, and he uneasily hugs her.
Kate's Beige House: Jerry Probst basically draws a map and provides pie charts and videotape of Claud shooting Michael. What's the point of stashing puzzle pieces all over the place if all the puzzle pieces ALSO contain the info that the big final piece supposedly contains? If anyone can stumble upon ANY of the dvd's and learn everythign, then ...uh....why hide more of the same? I hate Jerry Probst. Kate seems to still not know what all of this means.
Metrocourt: Edward awesomely tells Carly that it's too bad she didn't grow a conscience in time to help Michael. OH, burn, old man! Carly is very wounded. (but not as wounded as her son, so Shut Up, Carly's indignance)
GH: Sam tries to counsel Patrick. She says that Jason was there for her at the very worst time in her life, and knowing she had someone who loved her...if Patrick can do that for Robin, that's all she'll need. Patrick thanks her.
OR: Monica and Shawn D debate about starting surgery. Monica says she'll assist b/c he'll need another set of hands. Patrick shows up to take over, but Shawn D tells him to quit trying to steal his glory and to go home to his family. Patrick says the patient is all him.
Commercials
Metrocourt: As per usual when there's a crisis, Jax is leaving town. He has to go to Hong Kong. In a blizzard! He asks Olivia to explain all this to Carly. (because phones don't exist)
Kate finds loo and says she can have her job back if she'll go the Benefit and stand guard while Kate talks to Sonny.
GH: Edward asks if Michael has improved. Is this Benefit taking place in a stuffy GH meeting room? How lame. Nik finds Claud and reminds us all that he knows Claud was involved with Michael's shooting. He agrees to keep her secret but says remembering how vibrant Michael used to be makes it difficult. Edward flirts with Nadine. He loves willowy blonds, that one. Sonny and Carly maudlinly greet each other.
Jason's Penthouse: Spinelli has narrowed down a few people and says he'll see if they have criminal records. Jason doesn't want him to hack into a govt database. Spinelli learns that Earl Bragg, one of the suspects, had a car accident and is at GH.
GH: Patrick checks Bragg's x-rays. Piph gets a call that just happens to be about Bragg. Patrick grabs the phone and asks why the caller is calling about Bragg. Then he says "poison?" and then he either says "yeah, I know WHERE it is" or "Yeah, I know WHAT it is"
commercials
We've finally gotten the point of the show whereby Patrick warns Piph to call the OR and tell them not to operate.
Patrick frantically tells Piph to call the OR and tell Shawn D not to operate on that patient under any circumstances, then he sprints towards the elevators holding a file. We hear a ticking clock as Piph immediately picks up the phone and dials.
In the OR Monica announces the patient is minutes away from going into V tach and asks if the lab readings on the patient's blood are here yet. She's told they are on their way.
Patrick sprints to the elevator and hits the button. In the OR Shawn D asks if they are good and Liz tells him they are. Patrick stares up at the clock, which reads 7:00pm and then turns and sprints to the stairwell. (hopefully he doesn't end up in New Orleans!) Shawn D calls for a scalpel as Piph hangs up and tries to call the OR again. Shawn D makes the first incision, and we fade to Robin at home. She runs her hands through her hair in frustration as Emma cries from another room. Patrick continues running up the stairs at GH. Spinelli, at Jason's penthouse, hangs up his phone and starts to move for the door. In the OR, Monica and Shawn D continue as we see Patrick running.
Nurse's station, Nik is on the phone and glances over and sees a woman in a beret who looks like Emily. He does a double take. More shots from the OR and Patrick running. Monica asks Layla if the patient has at least a liter in, and she says she'll check. Someone runs up some steps in the snow, maybe Spinelli. Shawn D asks a nurse to really follow the suction. Kate walks down a hall and into Carly's line of sight, causing Carly's face to fall as she talks to Sonny. She leaves. Looloo takes off an earring and throws it down in what appears to be anger and storms off. Johnny lays what appears to be an unconscious Maxie down on the ground. Spinelli grabs his coat and rushes out the door. We hear Emma crying through the monitor again, and Robin slowly approaches the baby monitor and throws it across the room, knocking over a vase of red roses.
Patrick continues running up the stairs and is on the 10th floor. Jason drives erratically, and we hear his tires screech. Layla tells Monica the patient's blood is here, so she tells Layla to pour it in b/c he's going to need every drop. Kate approaches Sonny from behind, looking ominous and troubled. We see a red-nailed hand holding one of jerry's dvd's. Claud approaches Sonny and gingerly touches his arm.
Patrick has to fiercely open the 10th floor stairwell door. Shawn D says he thinks he's found the problem and says he's going in and asks for a scalpel. Patrick rushes across the 10th floor and runs into a nurse, knocking over her supply cart. He keeps rushing. Shawn d calls for head's up b/c they have a bleeder, and he asks for suction.
Nik stands and stares at the woman who looks like Emily. Shawn D says there is so much blood, he can't see anything.
Carly eyes Sonny wearily. Kate walks down a hall and holds her stomach, taking a deep breath. Shawn D continues to instruct the nurse doing the suction. He thinks he's found the bleeder, but then says something is wrong. They are all silent for a beat and then blood spurts onto his mask and face. Everyone gasps in the OR. Patrick makes it to the OR door and yells for them to stop. He stands at the window and yells at Shawn D to stop and get out of the room. Monica's gloves are bloody, and she looks faint as she adjusts her surgical mask and sinks to the ground in slow motion. We see a close up of Patrick's face, frantically watching the scene and yelling for everyone to stop. Liz slowly turns and also looks faint and begins to sink to the ground. What appears to be flames show up at the bottom of the screen, but I think that's just effect? We vaguely see the forms of the surgeons and nurse's falling to the ground, and someone appears to try to open the door. There is also the face of a man gasping for breathPatrick pounds on the glass and bellows "nooooo!"
OLTL Recap 1/28: Get Down and Dirty
Cole opens his bag of pills and remembers hearing John, or someone say Marty is shutting everyone out, including Cole, and is currently with some stranger in a hotel room. Sounds about right that Cole wants a magic pill to shut that out! Cole reconsiders taking the pill, and John asks what he's doing here.
Piney Cafe: Rex joins Dorian and David. Do people on a mission to nirvana eat a lot of Moons over Myhammy?
Piney Cafe: Blair and Todd bicker about his impending trial for kidnapping. Todd is sure Tea has it all covered.
Blair's House: Tea is breaking the news that Todd tried to kill himself on New Year's Eve. Tea caresses Starr's hair and says Todd didn't want her to know and feel responsible. Tea is so awesomely evil.
Credits
Blair's House: Tea purrs that Todd is very complicated and a lot is happening to him right now with Marty and maybe losing his kids. Starr asks why Tea said Todd doesn't want her, Starr to feel responsible. Tea says Todd felt guilty about what happened to Starr's baby. Starr cries that he SHOULD feel guilty. Tea blames Dr. Joplin for the baby's death, not Todd. Starr says now Dr. Joplin is dead. She stops and thinks and cries that Dr. Joplin killed herself and Todd tried to kill himself b/c of her and her baby. Tea says she never should have said anything.
Piney Cafe: Blair says that Dr. Joplin took Starr's baby, with the plan of giving the baby to Todd, and if she hadn't done all kinds of shenannigans with moving or hiding the baby, the baby may still be alive. Blair points out that Nurse Lee will be able to seal the deal, but Todd is sure that Lee has such poor character it won't matter. Blair scoffs and isn't so sure b/c she did know wht Todd's plan was.
Piney Cafe: David explains to Rex that Dorian is about to sign over her worldly goods to the Big Cloud Sillyhead Zen Shack, or something like that. Rex says it's like investing in your spiritual future. David says he's doing the same, but it's only symbolic b/c he's penniless. Dorian pretends to be choking and needing water, so David leaves to get some. Then Dorian angrily asks Rex what he's doing.
John's Bar: Cole says he has a free period at school. Yeah, I kind of thought those were for studying and not hanging out in bras. Cole tells John he's worried about Marty. Wes shows up and Cole angrily says he's the SOB who's been using his mom. and then be breaks a bottle.
Commercials
John's Bar: Wes says he understands Cole is upset, but he's not using anyone. Cole rails at Wes and says she's sick and playing house in a hotel room. Wes remains calm and explains that maybe Marty feels comfortable around him b/c they don't share a past that she can't remember. He says it's killing Marty to let everyone down and break everyone's heart all day. Cole flails his arms around and tells Wes not to talk about his mom.
Vicki's Incredibly Homey and Delightful Kitchen: Jared holds a baby. Is this Starr's baby? Natalie isn't sure if it's time to let Jessica and "her" baby spend time together. Vicki says the the doctor thinks it's time for them to bond. Natalie reminds everyone about how Tess was trying to kill people not long ago, but Vicki is used to weird panic rooms of murderous intent and not as easily shaken as Natalie, I guess. Vicki takes Chloe to bring her to St. Anne's to see Jess.
Piney Cafe: David explains to Rex that Dorian was never happy with any of her previous life paths, so she's letting go of it. Rex asks what the Cloud and River Zen Shack needs money for. Dorian sips her water and grits through her teeth "maintenance." Rex says something about piranha eating their own, and David thanks him and tears up the paperwork. Dorian is confused. And probably in need of a good pedicure at this point.
Piney Cafe: Blair is concerned by what Tea will do to Starr on the stand. Todd says she's tough, and Blair angrily says Starr shouldn't have to keep being tough all the dang time.
Blair's House: Tea turns on the waterworks and says that Starr shouldn't feel responsible for Todd trying to kill himself, even though she's only discussing this so that Starr feels very guilty. Starr angrily and sadly tells Tea that she has to tell her all the details, or she'll feel responsible. Poor Tea has been backed into the briar patch, so she sobbingly tells Starr the truth she doesn't want to tell her. She says Todd and Marty had a fight on the roof of the Palace Hotel. Starr sadly asks if Tea is saying Todd jumped.
Johns' Bar: Wes has Cole in a sleeper hold until he promises he's calmed down. Cole agrees, so Wes unhands him. Then Cole sucker punches Wes. Kapow!
Commercials
John's Bar: Gigi gives Wes a bag of ice and says he'll have a shiner. John comes in to be filled in that Cole has a mean left hook.
Vicki's Kitchen: Jared comforts Natalie that the doctor is good and knows what he's doing with Jess. Natalie can't get over being held captive with a bomb for months on end. She gets that Jess isn't Tess, but she doesn't get how you know who's going to show up. Jared suggests they move out. What? Two grown adults with jobs having their own living space and not living with Mommy? How silly!
St. Anne's: Jess is nervous about meeting Chloe, but jubilantly takes her from Vicki's arms.
Blair's: Tea continues to sob believably. She says Todd is a complicated man and makes a lot of mistakes, and this time he couldn't deal with them. Starr and her tear stained face asks if Tea thinks Todd would try to kill himself again.
Piney Cafe: David blathers about stuff. Rex checks his wrist and pretends there is a watch there and says he has to leave. He says orange is very flattering on Dorian and leaves. Dorian says he's wormy. David tells Dorian he wants her to tell him what she already knows. Dorian sets her face to not look completely baffled by what David is talking about.
Commercials
Piney Cafe: Dorian asks David what he means. David says the real reason Rex upsets her: he hurt Adriyawna. Dorian says that she indeed hates his guts for that reason. She calms herself and says she is channeling a lot of negative energy about Rex. David solemnly says they have much work to do. Dorian breathes "so close" and breathes out "so far"
John's Bar: John broods and Cole broods. Brood boys brood!
Vicki's Kitchen: Jared says that he loves Bree and Chloe, but they aren't their children. Even though Natalie is the one making a stink about all of this, she says they can't move out b/c they have to watch over Bree and Chloe's safety.
St. Anne's: Jess holds Chloe and sobs happily. The doctor asks how Jess is feeling. She says she feels whole. With th edoctor's help, she says she feels like the baby is hers. She says she's not sure how she felt when she gave birth or about anything that happened last summer. Vicki grows concerned and tries to breezily ask the doctor to step into the hallway, but there's really no graceful way to nonchalantly interrupt a psych consult. Jess just stares happily at Chloe playing in her arms. In the hallway Vicki tells the doctor something is seriously wrong.
Commercials
St. Anne's: Vicki is alarmed that Jess doesn't remember anything about the birth or last summer. The doctor calmly says that Tess was in control. Vicki worries that Jess not remembering means she's not fully integrated. The doctor mumbo jumbos something that this happens, and in time Jess will remember. He insists he's seen no sign of Tess or Bess. He says Jess is ready to go home, as long as she has strict outpatient care. Vicki is happy about this.
Blair's House: Tea says Todd forbid Tea from cross examining Starr b/c he'd rather spend life in prison than see her suffer more. Starr says Tea is avoiding the question and asks again if she think Todd would attempt suicide again. Tea sadly answers she doesn't know. She says that Todd does beautiful and loving things, and it makes you think about what he could be. She wants him to have another chance. She laughs and says she shouldn't even be here right now, but she's Starr's friend, and keeping it from her felt wrong. She wanted Starr to know everything before going into court. She sobs that she does love Starr, and she hopes she knows. Starr softly thanks her. Tea leaves, making certain that no one busts her for being here. She tiptoes out the door, is what I'm saying. Also, she has a marvelous red coat that matches her evilness quite nicely.
John's Bar: Rex and Gigi gossip about David and how he used to be King of the Con Artists. Oh, come on, is anyone really buying that David is a VicerosI? Cole's 17 hour free period from school continues as patrons fill up the bar. John asks him to stick around and takes a call. Cole uses this as an excuse to take a pill. He also ignores a call from Starr.
Blair's House: Starr calls Langston, begging the sky for her to answer, but she doesn't. Starr grabs her coat and runs out.
Piney Cafe: Dorian says David is guiding her towards a higher plain. She's going to call some philanthropic friends and have them suggest some worthy charities for her fortune. Oh, somehow Rex got them to decide against Cloud and Moon Zen Shack, I guess. David says he has a better idea.
Commercials
John's Bar: Cole sits around and plays with his food. This bar serves pancakes? That seems remarkably odd. John says he doesn't think Wes seems as bad as he seems, and he promises Cole will get his mom back eventually. Cole complains that he has been patient. John asks Cole what he wanted to talk about, but Cole gruffly says it doesn't matter and leaves.
Rix has a phone call. Gigi is jealous of some woman named Jackie. Rex explains that he's a big flirt to get info what he needs. Oh, Gigi isn't jealous, she likes that Rex is a user. This was a weird scene. Is Gigi on something?
Piney Cafe: David wants to go mountain climbing to meditate. Dorian doesn't see how enlightenment will ward off frostbite. David asks what a journey is without hardships. Dorian deadpans "first class?" heh. But she agrees to go with David.
Blair and Todd bicker some more and Blair leaves. Tea sits down and says she's been off earning her hourly rate. You'd never guess in a million years that she'd just been sobbing to a teenager. Tea is ready to set her evil glare on a new victim: Lee Halperin.
Vicki's KItchen: Jared calls Natalie "Sparky" and says he has her back, and they are a team against the world. Natalie jumps into his arms.
St. Anne's: Vickie breaks the good news that Jess can go home in the next few days. Jess says Nat and Jared probably won't like it. Again, maybe all of you people pushing 30 years of age can think about getting your own homes. Vickie assures her Nat will deal, and then she comments on how Chloe is beautiful, just like Jess. and also Starr!
High School: Poor, forlorn Starr has made her way to school because I guess her 18 week "free period" is finally over. She makes her way to Dillon's class room and silently rushes to him to hug him, while he quizzes her what's wrong.
the end
Piney Cafe: Rex joins Dorian and David. Do people on a mission to nirvana eat a lot of Moons over Myhammy?
Piney Cafe: Blair and Todd bicker about his impending trial for kidnapping. Todd is sure Tea has it all covered.
Blair's House: Tea is breaking the news that Todd tried to kill himself on New Year's Eve. Tea caresses Starr's hair and says Todd didn't want her to know and feel responsible. Tea is so awesomely evil.
Credits
Blair's House: Tea purrs that Todd is very complicated and a lot is happening to him right now with Marty and maybe losing his kids. Starr asks why Tea said Todd doesn't want her, Starr to feel responsible. Tea says Todd felt guilty about what happened to Starr's baby. Starr cries that he SHOULD feel guilty. Tea blames Dr. Joplin for the baby's death, not Todd. Starr says now Dr. Joplin is dead. She stops and thinks and cries that Dr. Joplin killed herself and Todd tried to kill himself b/c of her and her baby. Tea says she never should have said anything.
Piney Cafe: Blair says that Dr. Joplin took Starr's baby, with the plan of giving the baby to Todd, and if she hadn't done all kinds of shenannigans with moving or hiding the baby, the baby may still be alive. Blair points out that Nurse Lee will be able to seal the deal, but Todd is sure that Lee has such poor character it won't matter. Blair scoffs and isn't so sure b/c she did know wht Todd's plan was.
Piney Cafe: David explains to Rex that Dorian is about to sign over her worldly goods to the Big Cloud Sillyhead Zen Shack, or something like that. Rex says it's like investing in your spiritual future. David says he's doing the same, but it's only symbolic b/c he's penniless. Dorian pretends to be choking and needing water, so David leaves to get some. Then Dorian angrily asks Rex what he's doing.
John's Bar: Cole says he has a free period at school. Yeah, I kind of thought those were for studying and not hanging out in bras. Cole tells John he's worried about Marty. Wes shows up and Cole angrily says he's the SOB who's been using his mom. and then be breaks a bottle.
Commercials
John's Bar: Wes says he understands Cole is upset, but he's not using anyone. Cole rails at Wes and says she's sick and playing house in a hotel room. Wes remains calm and explains that maybe Marty feels comfortable around him b/c they don't share a past that she can't remember. He says it's killing Marty to let everyone down and break everyone's heart all day. Cole flails his arms around and tells Wes not to talk about his mom.
Vicki's Incredibly Homey and Delightful Kitchen: Jared holds a baby. Is this Starr's baby? Natalie isn't sure if it's time to let Jessica and "her" baby spend time together. Vicki says the the doctor thinks it's time for them to bond. Natalie reminds everyone about how Tess was trying to kill people not long ago, but Vicki is used to weird panic rooms of murderous intent and not as easily shaken as Natalie, I guess. Vicki takes Chloe to bring her to St. Anne's to see Jess.
Piney Cafe: David explains to Rex that Dorian was never happy with any of her previous life paths, so she's letting go of it. Rex asks what the Cloud and River Zen Shack needs money for. Dorian sips her water and grits through her teeth "maintenance." Rex says something about piranha eating their own, and David thanks him and tears up the paperwork. Dorian is confused. And probably in need of a good pedicure at this point.
Piney Cafe: Blair is concerned by what Tea will do to Starr on the stand. Todd says she's tough, and Blair angrily says Starr shouldn't have to keep being tough all the dang time.
Blair's House: Tea turns on the waterworks and says that Starr shouldn't feel responsible for Todd trying to kill himself, even though she's only discussing this so that Starr feels very guilty. Starr angrily and sadly tells Tea that she has to tell her all the details, or she'll feel responsible. Poor Tea has been backed into the briar patch, so she sobbingly tells Starr the truth she doesn't want to tell her. She says Todd and Marty had a fight on the roof of the Palace Hotel. Starr sadly asks if Tea is saying Todd jumped.
Johns' Bar: Wes has Cole in a sleeper hold until he promises he's calmed down. Cole agrees, so Wes unhands him. Then Cole sucker punches Wes. Kapow!
Commercials
John's Bar: Gigi gives Wes a bag of ice and says he'll have a shiner. John comes in to be filled in that Cole has a mean left hook.
Vicki's Kitchen: Jared comforts Natalie that the doctor is good and knows what he's doing with Jess. Natalie can't get over being held captive with a bomb for months on end. She gets that Jess isn't Tess, but she doesn't get how you know who's going to show up. Jared suggests they move out. What? Two grown adults with jobs having their own living space and not living with Mommy? How silly!
St. Anne's: Jess is nervous about meeting Chloe, but jubilantly takes her from Vicki's arms.
Blair's: Tea continues to sob believably. She says Todd is a complicated man and makes a lot of mistakes, and this time he couldn't deal with them. Starr and her tear stained face asks if Tea thinks Todd would try to kill himself again.
Piney Cafe: David blathers about stuff. Rex checks his wrist and pretends there is a watch there and says he has to leave. He says orange is very flattering on Dorian and leaves. Dorian says he's wormy. David tells Dorian he wants her to tell him what she already knows. Dorian sets her face to not look completely baffled by what David is talking about.
Commercials
Piney Cafe: Dorian asks David what he means. David says the real reason Rex upsets her: he hurt Adriyawna. Dorian says that she indeed hates his guts for that reason. She calms herself and says she is channeling a lot of negative energy about Rex. David solemnly says they have much work to do. Dorian breathes "so close" and breathes out "so far"
John's Bar: John broods and Cole broods. Brood boys brood!
Vicki's Kitchen: Jared says that he loves Bree and Chloe, but they aren't their children. Even though Natalie is the one making a stink about all of this, she says they can't move out b/c they have to watch over Bree and Chloe's safety.
St. Anne's: Jess holds Chloe and sobs happily. The doctor asks how Jess is feeling. She says she feels whole. With th edoctor's help, she says she feels like the baby is hers. She says she's not sure how she felt when she gave birth or about anything that happened last summer. Vicki grows concerned and tries to breezily ask the doctor to step into the hallway, but there's really no graceful way to nonchalantly interrupt a psych consult. Jess just stares happily at Chloe playing in her arms. In the hallway Vicki tells the doctor something is seriously wrong.
Commercials
St. Anne's: Vicki is alarmed that Jess doesn't remember anything about the birth or last summer. The doctor calmly says that Tess was in control. Vicki worries that Jess not remembering means she's not fully integrated. The doctor mumbo jumbos something that this happens, and in time Jess will remember. He insists he's seen no sign of Tess or Bess. He says Jess is ready to go home, as long as she has strict outpatient care. Vicki is happy about this.
Blair's House: Tea says Todd forbid Tea from cross examining Starr b/c he'd rather spend life in prison than see her suffer more. Starr says Tea is avoiding the question and asks again if she think Todd would attempt suicide again. Tea sadly answers she doesn't know. She says that Todd does beautiful and loving things, and it makes you think about what he could be. She wants him to have another chance. She laughs and says she shouldn't even be here right now, but she's Starr's friend, and keeping it from her felt wrong. She wanted Starr to know everything before going into court. She sobs that she does love Starr, and she hopes she knows. Starr softly thanks her. Tea leaves, making certain that no one busts her for being here. She tiptoes out the door, is what I'm saying. Also, she has a marvelous red coat that matches her evilness quite nicely.
John's Bar: Rex and Gigi gossip about David and how he used to be King of the Con Artists. Oh, come on, is anyone really buying that David is a VicerosI? Cole's 17 hour free period from school continues as patrons fill up the bar. John asks him to stick around and takes a call. Cole uses this as an excuse to take a pill. He also ignores a call from Starr.
Blair's House: Starr calls Langston, begging the sky for her to answer, but she doesn't. Starr grabs her coat and runs out.
Piney Cafe: Dorian says David is guiding her towards a higher plain. She's going to call some philanthropic friends and have them suggest some worthy charities for her fortune. Oh, somehow Rex got them to decide against Cloud and Moon Zen Shack, I guess. David says he has a better idea.
Commercials
John's Bar: Cole sits around and plays with his food. This bar serves pancakes? That seems remarkably odd. John says he doesn't think Wes seems as bad as he seems, and he promises Cole will get his mom back eventually. Cole complains that he has been patient. John asks Cole what he wanted to talk about, but Cole gruffly says it doesn't matter and leaves.
Rix has a phone call. Gigi is jealous of some woman named Jackie. Rex explains that he's a big flirt to get info what he needs. Oh, Gigi isn't jealous, she likes that Rex is a user. This was a weird scene. Is Gigi on something?
Piney Cafe: David wants to go mountain climbing to meditate. Dorian doesn't see how enlightenment will ward off frostbite. David asks what a journey is without hardships. Dorian deadpans "first class?" heh. But she agrees to go with David.
Blair and Todd bicker some more and Blair leaves. Tea sits down and says she's been off earning her hourly rate. You'd never guess in a million years that she'd just been sobbing to a teenager. Tea is ready to set her evil glare on a new victim: Lee Halperin.
Vicki's KItchen: Jared calls Natalie "Sparky" and says he has her back, and they are a team against the world. Natalie jumps into his arms.
St. Anne's: Vickie breaks the good news that Jess can go home in the next few days. Jess says Nat and Jared probably won't like it. Again, maybe all of you people pushing 30 years of age can think about getting your own homes. Vickie assures her Nat will deal, and then she comments on how Chloe is beautiful, just like Jess. and also Starr!
High School: Poor, forlorn Starr has made her way to school because I guess her 18 week "free period" is finally over. She makes her way to Dillon's class room and silently rushes to him to hug him, while he quizzes her what's wrong.
the end
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